Actual Freedom – The Actual Freedom Mailing List Correspondence

December 06 2002

RESPONDENT: Hi all, I’m new to the list. I was just reading the correspondence between Richard & someone about dreams. Richard, could you please tell me a bit more on how to become conscious that one is dreaming while asleep? I don’t understand what is meant by ‘tracking down the dreamer’, ‘tracing the tracks’, ‘following the trail’, ‘tracking the waking entity’. To avoid being unconscious over & over, & never getting anywhere, did you use a dream diary to give yourself feedback? Thanks very much.

RICHARD: Welcome to The Actual Freedom Mailing List ... first of all I did not know that what I was doing was called lucid dreaming as I only found out about all the research on that subject later on when describing what I had done to another person. Which means that I was not preconditioned to either take control of the dreams nor steer them into particular directions (which is what a lot of lucid dreamers are interested in).

I wanted to understand the mechanics of dreaming – the nuts and bolts functioning of the dream process itself – with the aim of having dreaming cease ... period. What prompted me to investigate was a three-week period wherein there was, serendipitously, no dreaming happening at all: I would fall asleep and wake up a few seconds later, totally refreshed, only to discover upon looking at a clock that I had been asleep for quite a few hours ... a full night’s sleep, in other words, had the impression of being but a few seconds of unconsciousness.

All I did, basically, was make use of a strategy I had developed out of necessity as a child: I suffered from terrible nightmares at various times throughout my childhood and learned to wake up (albeit in sheer terror in the dead of the night) when nightmarish dreams occurred. I soon discovered that if I did not sit up and force the sleep-hungry eyes open for maybe a minute or so – so as to be able to then lie back down and sleep a dreamless sleep – I would drop back into the nightmare. Therefore, in order to investigate the dreaming process many, many years later I would form the intent, just like programming oneself to wake at say dawn without an alarm clock, before going to sleep that the commencement of a dream would trigger-off coming to the surface of consciousness whilst dreaming – but not fully wake up as in the nightmare strategy – and then slip back into the dreaming knowing that it was a dream.

It took a little practise but soon became a matter of course ... so much so that every ninety minutes or so, which is how often researchers have determined that dreaming may occur (in what is called rapid eye movement or REM sleep), I would half wake, become sufficiently conscious, and recommence dreaming with the awareness of being aware which daytime consciousness so deliciously allows ... thus ‘the dreamer’ could be tracked just as ‘the thinker’ and ‘the feeler’ can be tracked in waking awareness.

By ‘tracked’ (and ‘trailed’ or ‘traced’) I mean in the sense of locating, pinning down, and thus exposing, the entity within ... the identity cannot stand the bright light of awareness as its presence depends upon being able to lurk in the shadows protected, at root, by the very fear that it is. With the end of ‘the dreamer’ then dreaming became as if watching TV with the sound turned off (rather banal) and could be seen for the spasmodic play of ad hoc dreamtime representations of the real-life people, things and events (and previous dream-people, dream-scapes and dream-events) that it was ... there was nothing worthwhile to be discovered as only ‘my’ presence had made the dream sequences meaningful.

And, no, I never kept a ‘dream diary’ as there was nothing of value to record.

December 14 2002

RICHARD: ... with the end of ‘the dreamer’ then dreaming became as if watching TV with the sound turned off (rather banal) and could be seen for the spasmodic play of ad hoc dreamtime representations of the real-life people, things and events (and previous dream-people, dream-scapes and dream-events) that it was ... there was nothing worthwhile to be discovered as only ‘my’ presence had made the dream sequences meaningful. And, no, I never kept a ‘dream diary’ as there was nothing of value to record.

RESPONDENT: Perhaps lucid dreaming would prove useful while investigating my beliefs, etc. Could you please give some precise details on how you programmed your mind to wake up when dreaming began?

RICHARD: Nothing more complex is required than the simple reminder, while composing oneself for sleep, to be aware of dreaming when it happened.

RESPONDENT: I imagine if I simply told myself while falling asleep the words ‘Wake up when dreaming begins’ that I’d get nowhere. How did you make your mind know when dreaming had begun, then to become conscious?

RICHARD: There are various cues which can trigger off an awareness that one is dreaming: basically anything which is at odds with normal daytime experiencing (in the jargon it is called doing a reality check) ... such as the illusion of being able to fly, for example, or to be conversing with media personalities or historical or other deceased peoples, or being in an exotic location and so on.

Also, the dream-state has a certain ambience which the waking-state does not have ... it soon becomes easily recognisable.

RESPONDENT: Perhaps you also used a certain sequence of mental pictures, sounds, etc.?

RICHARD: No ... what it took was the intent to have it happen (the same as the intention to wake at a certain time so as to obviate the need for an alarm clock): intent is the unswerving commitment, a devotion of purpose not to be confused with will-power, to be having the objective of such dedication come to fruition ... intent is not a vow or a resolve (as in a new year’s resolution).

Having said that, what can be of assistance in achieving lucid dreaming is first practising what is known as hypnagogic (pre-dormient) or hypnopompic (post-dormient) hallucinations – the illusions, delusions, deliriums or calentures of one who is half asleep – which occur, respectively, in the drowsiness state of intermediate consciousness preceding sleep or in the semiconscious state of transitional consciousness preceding waking ... of the two I found the pre-dormient state the easier to manifest.

This surreal state can be brought about whilst sitting in a deckchair on the patio, for instance, or in an armchair whilst idly watching television, or any other situation where napping is likely to occur: the very drowsiness stage is the cue to remind oneself not to fall asleep but to hover in the twilight zone between waking consciousness and sleeping consciousness. All manner of things recondite can, and do, come to light – Mr. Emanuel Swedenborg, for example, as evidenced in his ‘Journal of Dreams’ (1743-44) was an exemplar of the hypnagogic state – none of which esoterica can stand close scrutiny, of course, and the basis of most of humankind’s metaphysics can be thus exposed for what it is.

As for inducing lucid dreaming by ‘sounds’ ... there are repeating time-based mnemonics available, that may very well be worth experimenting with, several of which can be downloaded from here: www.xs4all.nl/~pasquale/TTM/4/index3.html

This seems to be the simplest programme: www.xs4all.nl/~pasquale/TTM/4/3/dreamscape.zip

You would either need to have a laptop nearby where you sleep or have set up a small speaker on an extension cable from a desktop ... a suitable time-period to start off with would be every 90 minutes. I have never used something like this myself but I do not see why it would not work ... another way is to wake up say two hours before normally arising, occupy yourself simply for that period, then go back to sleep for the missing two hours (with the intent to be aware of dreaming) as either lucid dreaming or the hypnopompic state happens more readily after a nearly complete sleep.

But the intent to be aware is the main thing.

December 14 2002

RESPONDENT: Before one can investigate beliefs, morals, etc does there have to be a recalled memory of a PCE?

RICHARD: No, there is sufficient information presented on The Actual Freedom Trust Website to establish a prima facie case worthy of further investigation – rather than capricious dismissal – which examination may very well induce recall ... or a fresh pure consciousness experience (PCE).

The PCE enables one to know, for oneself, that actualism is not a philosophy.

December 14 2002

RESPONDENT: What do you call the psychological principle that causes us to just stop believing in our beliefs, morals, values, & principles?

RICHARD: Quite possibly it could fit into the category known as ‘the will to freedom’ ... but by and large psychology/psychiatry aims at producing what is often called ‘a well-adjusted ego’ wherein the conflicting demands of self and society are balanced.

Incidentally, one cannot safely ‘stop believing in our beliefs, morals, values, & principles’ without coincidentally being happy and harmless as social conditioning is inculcated from a very early age for a very good reason – to control the wayward self born of the instinctual passions – and is more or less successful ... only a small percentage of a population wind up being behind bars.

However, it does not and will not produce peace-on-earth ... at best an uneasy truce.

RESPONDENT: I haven’t identified what makes the investigative process work, yet.

RICHARD: Put briefly: the pure intent to enable peace-on-earth sooner rather than later.

RESPONDENT: My mind is very stubborn.

RICHARD: Good ... stubbornness, when redirected into being a determination to succeed, is essential if one is not to settle for second best.

RESPONDENT: No matter how much logic I use, it still hangs on.

RICHARD: The most effective way to investigate all the beliefs, ideas, theories, concepts, maxims, dictums, truths, factoids, philosophies, values, principles, ideals, standards, credos, doctrines, tenets, canons, morals, ethics, customs, traditions, psittacisms, superstitions, myths, legends, folklores, imaginations, divinations, visions, fantasies, chimeras, illusions, delusions, hallucinations, phantasmagoria and any other of the schemes and dreams and mores which constitute social conditioning is the hands-on moment-to-moment approach – the on-the-job real-time experiencing where all the real-life people, things and events are currently occurring in a real-world context – rather than armchair philosophising.

If one asks oneself, each moment again, how one is experiencing this moment of being alive (which is the only moment one is ever alive) all will be revealed in due course, in the bright light of awareness, as one goes about one’s normal life. Moreover, all the instinctive drives, urges, impulses, compulsions, demands, pressures, cravings, yearnings, longings – all the instinctual passions which necessitate social conditioning in the first place – will be laid bare with the perspicacity born of pure intent and thus open for examination.

The human mind cops a lot of bad press ... but only because its native intelligence is crippled.

December 15 2002

RICHARD: ... if one asks oneself, each moment again, how one is experiencing this moment of being alive (which is the only moment one is ever alive) all will be revealed in due course, in the bright light of awareness, as one goes about one’s normal life. Moreover, all the instinctive drives, urges, impulses, compulsions, demands, pressures, cravings, yearnings, longings – all the instinctual passions which necessitate social conditioning in the first place – will be laid bare with the perspicacity born of pure intent and thus open for examination. The human mind cops a lot of bad press ... but only because its native intelligence is crippled.

RESPONDENT: Am I correct in concluding that the decision for peace on earth (with pure intent) is the ‘mechanism’ that allows us to dissipate all our triggers that cause malice & sorrow?

RICHARD: Yes, this is because ‘the decision for peace on earth’ is to choose to dedicate oneself 100% to having that happen (which dedication makes peace on earth the overriding priority in life irregardless of whatever situations and circumstances may arise) and unequivocally deciding for peace on earth actualises the pure intent to enable such a condition just here right now: pure intent is the unwavering devotion to living life happily and harmlessly each moment again – being peaceful and harmonious is an ongoing commitment – and it is the very staunchness of pure intent which ensures continued success ... malice and sorrow (and thus their antidotal pacifiers love and compassion) have no room in which to manoeuvre where benignity and benevolence flourish.

It is a sincere decision ... and sincerity unlocks naiveté.

February 20 2003

RESPONDENT: Is it far more important to be committed to being happy & harmless than it is to extensively investigate?

RICHARD: I would suggest a re-read of this e-mail: (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 38, 15 December 2002).

RESPONDENT: The reason I ask this is because the one question method of Actualism is way too simplistic to be effective.

RICHARD: It is the only method, in all of human history, which has worked to deliver the goods ... there may be other methods, yet to be discovered, but this is the only one so far proven to be effective.

RESPONDENT: Everybody asks ‘why’. When something goes wrong ‘why’ is often the first thing that people ask. If asking ‘why’ worked, then plenty of people would have discovered that it works.

RICHARD: Yet the ‘way too simplistic’ question is a ‘how’ question ... not a ‘why’ question.

RESPONDENT: I’m not asking whether ‘why’ is actually a waste of time or not, I’m asking, well, my first question above.

RICHARD: Perhaps the following link will be of assistance: (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 39, 15 December 2002).

You may have overlooked it the first time around as I sent it only 7 minutes before I sent the e-mail (as per the link further above) in response to your query.

In short: the wide and wondrous path to an actual freedom from the human condition is marked by enjoyment and appreciation – the sheer delight of being as happy and harmless as is humanly possible whilst remaining a ‘self’ – and the slightest diminishment of such felicity/ innocuity is a warning signal (a flashing red light as it were) that one has inadvertently wandered off the way.

One is thus soon back on track ... and all because of everyday events.

March 22 2003

RESPONDENT: Richard, if a happy & harmless person were to decide whether or not to produce something that as a side consequence pollutes &/or damages the environment, how would they objectively do it so that all happy & harmless people would come to the same decision?

RICHARD: I would appreciate it if you could describe how an unhappy and harmful person objectively decides, so that all unhappy and harmful people come to the same decision, whether or not to produce something which, as a side effect, pollutes and/or damages the environment.

Then the nature of your query will become clear.

March 23 2003

RESPONDENT: Richard, if a happy & harmless person were to decide whether or not to produce something that as a side consequence pollutes &/or damages the environment, how would they objectively do it so that all happy & harmless people would come to the same decision?

RICHARD: I would appreciate it if you could describe how an unhappy and harmful person objectively decides, so that all unhappy and harmful people come to the same decision, whether or not to produce something which, as a side effect, pollutes and/or damages the environment. Then the nature of your query will become clear.

RESPONDENT: Do you appreciate what technology does for us, such as a computer, which is made with toxic chemicals?

RICHARD: What I would appreciate, before moving on to your second question, is your description of how an unhappy and harmful person objectively decides, so that all unhappy and harmful people come to the same decision, whether or not to produce something which, as a side effect, pollutes and/or damages the environment.

Then the nature of your initial query will become clear.

RESPONDENT: If you decided to produce something, how would you decide whether or not to produce it if it has a noticeable polluting effect on the environment from manufacturing it & perhaps its permanent existence?

RICHARD: This is but a variation on your initial query ... so if you could describe how you would decide whether or not to produce something which has a noticeable polluting effect on the environment from manufacturing it, and perhaps its permanent existence, the nature of this query will become clear as well.

RESPONDENT: If we continue to produce things that pollute (no matter how much benefit it provides), eventually the planet will be unhealthy to live on.

RICHARD: As this is but a latter-day version of the doomsday syndrome which has afflicted many otherwise intelligent peoples all throughout human history I will pass without further comment.

April 03 2003

RESPONDENT: Richard, would you know of any psychotherapists or psychologists in New Zealand who utilise the Actual Freedom method? If I could have a few sessions with someone who knows what they are doing, that would be awesome.

RICHARD: Here is the actualism method in its entirety ... totally free of charge:

• Ask yourself, each moment again, the following question: ‘How am I experiencing this moment of being alive?’

The actualism method is a DIY method: nobody else can possibly know your every thought, your every feeling, your every instinctual impulse ... another person cannot know the nuances of your ethnic background, the intimate details of your familial upbringing, the subtleties of your peer-group aspirations and so on and so on.

Only you can set yourself free ... your freedom is in your hands and your hands alone.

January 20 2004

RESPONDENT: Does investigating mean feeling a feeling, or questioning it? If I have to question a feeling, then the method can become extremely difficult because no matter how much I question myself, my mind won’t budge.

While investigating being sad, how do I know when I can actually get back to feeling good? Do I have to force myself to feel good again, or should the feeling be fading, or gone before I attempt to feel good again?

RICHARD: You may find the following to be of assistance:

• [Richard]: ‘Before applying the actualism method – the ongoing enjoyment and appreciation of this moment of being alive – it is essential for success to grasp the fact that this very moment which is happening now is your only moment of being alive. The past, although it did happen, is not actual now. The future, though it will happen, is not actual now. Only now is actual. Yesterday’s happiness and harmlessness does not mean a thing if one is miserable and malicious now and a hoped-for happiness and harmlessness tomorrow is to but waste this moment of being alive in waiting. All one gets by waiting is more waiting. Thus any ‘change’ can only happen now. The jumping in point is always here; it is at this moment in time and this place in space. Thus, if one misses it this time around, hey presto, one has another chance immediately. Life is excellent at providing opportunities like this.
What ‘I’ did, all those years ago, was to devise a remarkably effective way to be able to enjoy and appreciate this moment of being alive each moment again (I know that methods are to be actively discouraged, in some people’s eyes, but this one worked). It does take some doing to start off with but, as success after success starts to multiply exponentially, it becomes progressively easier to enjoy and appreciate being here each moment again. One begins by asking, each moment again, ‘How am I experiencing this moment of being alive’?
Note: asking how one is experiencing this moment of being alive is not the actualism method; consistently enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive is what the actualism method is. And this is because the actualism method is all about consciously and knowingly imitating life in the actual world. Also, by virtue of proceeding in this manner the means to the end – an ongoing enjoyment and appreciation – are no different to the end itself
This perpetual enjoyment and appreciation is facilitated by feeling as happy and as harmless as is humanly possible. And this (affective) felicity/ innocuity is potently enabled via minimisation of both the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ feelings. An affective awareness is the key to maximising felicity and innocuity over all those alternate feelings inasmuch the slightest diminishment of enjoyment and appreciation automatically activates attentiveness.
Attentiveness to the cause of diminished enjoyment and appreciation restores felicity and innocuity. The habituation of actualistic awareness and attentiveness requires a persistent initialisation; persistent initialisation segues into a wordless approach, a non-verbal attitude towards life. It delivers the goods just here, right now, and not off into some indeterminate future. Plus the successes are repeatable – virtually on demand – and thus satisfy the ‘scientific method’.
As one knows from the pure consciousness experiences (PCE’s), which are moments of perfection everybody has at some stage in their life, that it is possible to experience this moment in time and this place in space as perfection personified, ‘I’ set the minimum standard of experience for myself: feeling good. If ‘I’ am not feeling good then ‘I’ have something to look at to find out why. What has happened, between the last time ‘I’ felt good and now? When did ‘I’ feel good last? Five minutes ago? Five hours ago? What happened to end those felicitous feelings? Ahh ... yes: ‘He said that and I ...’. Or: ‘She didn’t do this and I ...’. Or: ‘What I wanted was ...’. Or: ‘I didn’t do ...’. And so on and so on ... one does not have to trace back into one’s childhood ... usually no more than yesterday afternoon at the most (‘feeling good’ is an unambiguous term – it is a general sense of well-being – and if anyone wants to argue about what feeling good means ... then do not even bother trying to do this at all).
Once the specific moment of ceasing to feel good is pin-pointed, and the silliness of having such an incident as that (no matter what it is) take away one’s enjoyment and appreciation of this only moment of being alive is seen for what it is – usually some habitual reactive response – one is once more feeling good ... but with a pin-pointed cue to watch out for next time so as to not have that trigger off yet another bout of the same-old same-old. This is called nipping it in the bud before it gets out of hand ... with application and diligence and patience and perseverance one soon gets the knack of this and more and more time is spent enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive. And, of course, once one does get the knack of this, one up-levels ‘feeling good’, as a bottom line each moment again, to ‘feeling happy and harmless’ ... and after that to ‘feeling perfect’.
The more one enjoys and appreciates being just here right now – to the point of excellence being the norm – the greater the likelihood of a PCE happening ... a grim and/or glum person has no chance whatsoever of allowing the magical event, which indubitably shows where everyone has being going awry, to occur. Plus any analysing and/or psychologising and/or philosophising whilst one is in the grip of debilitating feelings usually does not achieve much (other than spiralling around and around in varying degrees of despair and despondency or whatever) anyway.
The wide and wondrous path to an actual freedom from the human condition is marked by enjoyment and appreciation – the sheer delight of being as happy and harmless as is humanly possible whilst remaining a ‘self’ – and the slightest diminishment of such felicity/ innocuity is a warning signal (a flashing red light as it were) that one has inadvertently wandered off the way.
One is thus soon back on track ... and all because of everyday events.
(...)
Thus, by asking ‘how am I experiencing this moment of being alive,’ the reward is immediate; by finding out what triggered off the loss of the felicitous/ innocuous feeling, one commences another period of enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive. It is all about being here at this moment in time and this place in space ... and if you are not feeling happy and harmless you have no chance whatsoever of being here in this actual world (a glum and/or grumpy person locks themselves out of the perfect purity of this moment and place). And by having already established feeling good (a general sense of well-being) as the bottom line for moment-to-moment experiencing then if, or when, feeling happy and harmless fades there is that comfortable baseline from which to suss out where, when, how, why – and what for – the feeling of being happy and harmless ceased happening ... and all the while feeling good whilst going about it.
Furthermore if, or when, there is a sinking below the bottom line, and feeling bad (a general sense of ill-being) is the moment-to-moment experiencing then, rather than trying to suss out where, when, how, why – and what for – the general sense of well-being (feeling good) ceased occurring, it is far more useful to first get to a stage of being neutral, because, when in the feeling bad position, feeling good can appear to be so, so far away ... indeed, at times, feeling good can seem to be but a dream, a fancy, a chimera, a will-o’-the-wisp, from that position, and what’s the point anyway, that method didn’t work either (of course), it’s all stupid, life sucks, and ... and all the rest of those self-pitying, self-justifying, defeatist assertions.
As the step from being neutral to feeling good is not such a big step then one is soon back on track again. (Richard, Articles, This Moment of Being Alive).

January 28 2004

RESPONDENT: Does investigating mean feeling a feeling, or questioning it? If I have to question a feeling, then the method can become extremely difficult because no matter how much I question myself, my mind won’t budge. After I’ve deliberately felt myself as, say, sadness, do I then decide that it is an emotion (real) or a physical feeling (actual)? If I do, that would mean I’m dissociating from the feeling? While investigating being sad, how do I know when I can actually get back to feeling good? Do I have to force myself to feel good again, or should the feeling be fading, or gone before I attempt to feel good again?

RICHARD: You may find the following to be of assistance: [Richard]: ‘(snip) ... Once the specific moment of ceasing to feel good is pin-pointed, and the silliness of having such an incident as that (no matter what it is) take away one’s enjoyment and appreciation of this only moment of being alive is seen for what it is – usually some habitual reactive response – one is once more feeling good ... but with a pin-pointed cue to watch out for next time so as to not have that trigger off yet another bout of the same-old same-old. This is called nipping it in the bud before it gets out of hand ... with application and diligence and patience and perseverance one soon gets the knack of this and more and more time is spent enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive. (snip).

RESPONDENT: How do I see something as silly?

RICHARD: It is essential to grasp the fact that this is one’s only moment of being alive. The past, although it did happen, is not actual now. The future, though it will happen, is not actual now. Only now is actual. To waste this moment, the only moment one is ever actually alive, by not being happy and harmless (free of malice and sorrow) and thus not enjoying and appreciating being alive probably could be described in any number of ways ... ‘silly’ was the way the identity who used to inhabit this flesh and blood body all those years ago described it.

RESPONDENT: For example, my little compulsiveness about being clean. It’s silly because: I’m not happy when I feel the compulsion to clean my hands. There’s nothing on my hands that anyone can see, or would harm anyone. No one else cares about cleanliness after touching whatever I’ve touched. The dirtiness is really just my opinion. My mum taught me to clean my hands, and before that I didn’t care at all. I didn’t care about being perfectly clean for most of my life. It’s impossible to be perfectly clean for more than a few minutes. I’m probably never perfectly clean anyway. I didn’t care that I was dirty when I didn’t know it was dirty. After all this I still hold onto my silly compulsion. What else can I do?

RICHARD: As a suggestion only: going by how you describe your ‘little compulsiveness’ (which is why this is only a suggestion) you could seek professional assistance ... the actualism method is not a cure for psychiatric disorders.

RESPONDENT: Not only can’t I eliminate this, I haven’t really been able to eliminate anything so far.

RICHARD: Here is another suggestion: first cure yourself of your ‘little compulsiveness’ (there is nothing like a confidence boost to set things in motion).