Actual Freedom – The Actual Freedom Mailing List Correspondence

Richard’s Correspondence

On The Actual Freedom Mailing List

with Correspondent No. 60


October 09 2005

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): (...) I am chipping in here because I think Richard will play with you as a cat plays with mice. If you want a straight answer, here it is: Richard is promoting something entirely different from what you are living/ teaching ...

RICHARD: And I am chipping in here because of what you think ... my very first e-mail to your co-respondent is to be found at the following URL: http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=905191077

Just in case you cannot access it here it is in its entirety:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘I ran across Richard, Peter and Alan’s websites which were delightful to read by the way, very nice indeed. I plan on reading them some more. I liked the music too. I’d like to share some of the stuff, if you don’t mind on my own mailing list, The End of the Rope Ranch, if that’s alright with you guys. Some very good stuff there. Anyway, I wanted to drop in and say hi!

• [Richard]: ‘Welcome to The Actual Freedom Mailing List, No. 36. I accessed the link you provided and it may be apposite to point out early in the piece that an actual freedom is a non-spiritual freedom ... it lies beyond spiritual enlightenment and thus is not at all compatible with what is popularly known as the non-dual perspective.

I look forward with interest, therefore, to your considered appraisal when you do read some more of the web pages and see for yourself what I mean’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 6 September 2002).

If you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me playing [quote] ‘as a cat plays with mice’ [endquote] it would be most appreciated.

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): (...) He has tried to tell you this, albeit in a teasing roundabout way ...

RICHARD: My second e-mail to your co-respondent is to be found at the following URL: http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=907202232

Just in case you cannot access it here is how it begins:

• [Richard]: ‘I have oft-times said that I have no solutions for life in the real-world ... the only solution is dissolution.

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘Yes, exactly Richard.

• [Richard]: ‘For the sake of clarity in communication here is what you have to say on your web site: [quote] ‘There is no separate anything that exists apart from God Itself. That is all there is, and I am that’. (www.users.uniserve.com/~samuel/judi-1.htm). As you make it quite clear that you are ‘God Itself’ I do wonder just what it is that you are agreeing with ... because anybody who reads what I have to report with both eyes open is aware that by ‘dissolution’ I am referring to the extinction of identity in toto (which means not only ego-dissolution but the dissolution of ‘me’ at the core of ‘my’ being, which is ‘being’ itself, as well) whereupon Being, Presence, Self, Truth, or God by any other name, ceases to exist forever and the pristine purity of this actual world is immediate.

In other words: with no God to meddle in human affairs any longer one walks freely, as this flesh and blood body only, in the already existing peace-on-earth’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 30 March 2003).

Again, if you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me trying to tell it in a [quote] ‘teasing roundabout way’ [endquote] it would be most appreciated.

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): ... He does not / will not hesitate to make a fool of you, and you are the only one who is not noticing it.

RICHARD: Here is what follows the exchange already quoted just above:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘‘Peace’ is an oxymoron, for all you ‘maroons’ out there. :-)

• [Richard]: ‘As the word ‘maroon’ variously means stranded, cut off, forsaken, left behind, and so on, I presume by ‘all you ‘maroons’’ you are meaning peoples who have the idea that they are a separate something or other, which keeps them locked in a body in time and space, when the truth is there is only God? Viz.: [quote] ‘... you see, all there is, is God! You have this idea that you are a separate something or other which keeps you locked in a body in time and space. When the truth is, there is only God’. (www.users.uniserve.com/~samuel/judi-1.htm). May I ask? Just how much of what is on offer on The Actual Freedom Trust web site have you read this last six months?’ (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 30 March 2003).

Once again, if you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me not hesitating to [quote] ‘make a fool’ [endquote] of my co-respondent it would be most appreciated.

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): (...) Richard will tell you all this ... just ask him, and don’t let him toy with you.

RICHARD: Here is the very next exchange which follows the exchange already quoted a little further above:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘[quote] ‘I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contain’d, I stand and look at them long and long. They do not sweat and whine about their condition, they do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins, they do not make me sick discussing their duty to God, not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things, not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago, not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth. (Walt Whitman).

• [Richard]: ‘First of all it is pertinent to mention that Mr. Walt Whitman’s greatest theme, throughout his work, was a symbolic identification of the regenerative power of nature with the deathless divinity of the soul ... and although he was profoundly influenced by transcendentalist ideas, in particular the work of Mr. Ralph Waldo Emerson, the following line of his perhaps best encapsulates his core experience/ understanding: [quote] ‘... Divine am I inside and out, and I make holy whatever I touch or am touched from ...’. (from ‘Song of Myself’, the leading poem in the first edition of ‘Leaves of Grass’, published 1885). As for living with the animals: just for starters, anybody who considers that animals are ‘so placid’ (and therefore think to live with them and/or be like them and/or live as they do) can only be viewing them through a romanticist’s eyes ... by being born and raised on a farm being carved out of virgin forest I interacted with other animals – both domesticated and in the wild – from a very early age and have been able to observe again and again that, by and large, animals are not ‘so placid’ after all ... they are mostly on the alert, vigilant, scanning for attack, and prone to the fright-freeze-flee-fight reaction all sentient beings inherit’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 30 March 2003).

Yet again, if you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me toying with my co-respondent it would be most appreciated.

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): (...) ask Richard, he will tell you all this in no uncertain terms if you only you can get him to give it to you straight.

RICHARD: Here is what follows on from that very next exchange which follows the exchange already quoted somewhat further above:

• [Richard]: ‘Further to the point I was able to observe, and have maintained a life-long interest in observing, the correspondence the basic instinctual passions in the human animal have with the basic instinctual passions in the other animals ... to see the self-same feelings of fear and aggression and nurture and desire, for example, in other sentient beings renders any notion of living with them and/or being like them and/or living as they do simply ridiculous.

For some simple examples: I have seen a dog acting in a way that can only be called pining; I have watched a cat toying with a mouse in a manner that would be dubbed cruel; I have noticed cows ‘spooked’ and then stampede in what must be described as hysteria; I have beheld stallions displaying what has to be labelled aggression; I have observed many animals exhibiting what has to be specified as fear ... and even in these days of my retirement, from my comfortable suburban living room, I can tune into documentaries on this very topic: only recently a television series was aired again about observations made of chimpanzees over many, many years in their native habitat and I was able to identify fear, aggression, territoriality, civil war, robbery, rage, infanticide, cannibalism, nurture, grief, group ostracism, bonding, desire, and so on, being displayed in living colour.

It is easily discerned by those with the eyes to see that animals do not live in peace by being as they naturally are. The insistence that the animal state being a natural state and therefore somehow innocent which is held by many people is but a wistful ‘long lost golden age’ fantasy’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 30 March 2003).

Even yet again, if you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me not giving it straight to my co-respondent it would be most appreciated.

RESPONDENT (to Co-Respondent): (...) it is painful to see an apparently well-meaning, loving person being played for a fool, and that is what he does with you.

RICHARD: Here is what follows on from that which follows on from that very next exchange which follows the exchange already quoted quite a way further above:

• [Richard]: ‘Now that intelligence, which is the ability to think, reflect, compare, evaluate and implement considered action for beneficial reasons, has developed in the human animal the blind survival passions are no longer necessary – in fact they have become a hindrance in today’s world – and it is only by virtue of this intelligence that blind nature’s default software package can be safely deleted (via altruistic ‘self’-immolation in toto).

No other animal can do this’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 30 March 2003).

And yet even yet again, if you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me playing my co-respondent [quote] ‘for a fool’ [endquote] it would be most appreciated.

October 09 2005

CO-RESPONDENT: Reported saying of the Buddha, in Bahiya Sutta: ‘Then, Bahiya, you should train yourself thus: In reference to the seen, there will be only the seen. In reference to the heard, only the heard. In reference to the sensed, only the sensed. In reference to the cognized, only the cognized. That is how you should train yourself. When for you there will be only the seen in reference to the seen, only the heard in reference to the heard, only the sensed in reference to the sensed, only the cognized in reference to the cognized, then, Bahiya, there is no you in terms of that. When there is no you in terms of that, there is no you there. When there is no you there, you are neither here nor yonder nor between the two. This, just this, is the end of stress’. ‘Monks, Bahiya of the Bark-cloth was wise. He practiced the Dhamma in accordance with the Dhamma and did not pester me with issues related to the Dhamma. Bahiya of the Bark-cloth, monks, is totally unbound’. Then, on realizing the significance of that, the Blessed One on that occasion exclaimed: Where water, earth, fire, & wind have no footing: There the stars do not shine, the sun is not visible, the moon does not appear, darkness is not found. And when a sage, a brahman through sagacity, has known [this] for himself, then from form & formless, from bliss & pain, he is freed’. [endquote]. I like Buddha, because (some of) what he says has just the right mix of matter-of-fact-ness an poetry. As it all has been said so often, as I think I have found the form of life that makes the problem of life disappear, as I can only thank all the people on this list – and so many other, in fact, the whole universe – there’s nothing left to say. What a lovely holiday.

RESPONDENT: Yeah, me too. When all’s said and done, it really is very simple. It’s about finding out, from experience, whatever it is one needs to know. Then it’s only a matter of being it, doing it, living it. Nice to have ‘met’ you, No. 103; you sure livened things up around here!

RICHARD: Somehow I am reminded of the following perspicacious words (deliberately left un-attributed for reasons which may become apparent):

[quote] ‘The pattern is so obvious: get lost and confused, and tired of searching for meaning; give up; find someone who says there’s nothing to find and nothing you can do; believe him; propagate this belief for all you’re worth; pose as Mr Ordinary with no agenda to push – and push that agenda like all get out; anyone who shows any sign of intelligence or independence of mind, latch onto them and thrust them forward as your leader; stand behind them making pathetic taunts at the opposition, and wave the those pompoms and streamers. Go fanboys, go!
Hey [name deleted] and [name deleted], for all the balls you show around here, you might as well start decking yourselves out in short skirts and frilly knickers, and start waving pompoms around. What has happened to you fairies? If Richard said ‘war is a phenomenon as such it is not real’, you guys would fucking flip. *When someone else says it ... not a murmur*. I can’t help wondering, for all the swagger, do you guys swing any balls at all? For all the balls and integrity you show here you might as well be swinging an empty sack and a patch of fluffy down’. [emphasis added].

RESPONDENT: The way you have restructured these messages, it reads like No. 103 praising Buddha for disappearing up his own ring ...

RICHARD: The text starting with the words ‘reported saying ...’ and finishing with the words ‘... end of stress’ was posted at 1:35 AM AEST Friday 7/10/2005 and 13 minutes later (at 1:48 AM on Friday 7/10/2005) the text starting with ‘Monks ...’ and ending with the words ‘... he is freed’ was added on so as to succeed that text whilst the text starting with the words ‘I like Buddha, because ...’ and ending with the words ‘... a lovely holiday’ was added on so as to precede that original text (the text starting with the words ‘reported saying ...’).

Put simply: all I did, as the text starting with the words ‘I like Buddha, because ...’ was added simultaneous to the text starting with ‘Monks ...’ being added (which is the text wherein Mr. Gotama the Sakyan exclaims about scarpering off to the place where the sun don’t shine as a way of dealing with the human condition) was to re-present it in its chronological sequence.

In just what way does my chronologically-sequenced re-presentation make it read like it did not already read?

RESPONDENT: ... and me offering my heartfelt agreement. That is not at all what happened. To set the record straight, my ‘me too’ was a reference to the subject line ‘I’ll shut up now’ (which I thought would be obvious because all other text was stripped).

RICHARD: I was well aware (for that very reason) that what you were agreeing to was the subject line ... what I was responding to was your exclamatory encouragement. Viz.:

• [Respondent]: ‘... you sure livened things up around here!’ [endquote].

RESPONDENT: Why you would deliberately make it seem like an endorsement of Buddha’s dextrous disappearing act, which I do not endorse or aspire to emulate, is quite beyond me.

RICHARD: Hmm ... what you say there exemplifies why I emphasised the words [quote] ‘When someone else says it ... not a murmur’ [endquote].

RESPONDENT: (Actually, it isn’t entirely. I do take your point, but the means of making it are dodgy to say the least).

RICHARD: The point I am making is your encouragement of an ex-pantheist’s (purported) livening-up of exchanges on this mailing list ... an ex-pantheist whose interest is [quote] ‘not in newness’ [endquote] and who has a demonstrated penchant for posting religio-spiritual/mystico-metaphysical quotes and links.

May I ask? In what way is Mr. Gotama the Sakyan’s dextrous disappearing act [quote] ‘just the right mix of *matter-of-fact-ness* an poetry’ [emphasis added] such as to not bring forth even the slightest murmur from you?

October 09 2005

RESPONDENT: The way you have restructured these messages, it reads like No. 103 praising Buddha for disappearing up his own ring ...

RICHARD: The text starting with the words ‘reported saying ...’ and finishing with the words ‘... end of stress’ was posted at 1:35 AM AEST Friday 7/10/2005 and 13 minutes later (at 1:48 AM on Friday 7/10/2005) the text starting with ‘Monks ...’ and ending with the words ‘... he is freed’ was added on so as to succeed that text whilst the text starting with the words ‘I like Buddha, because ...’ and ending with the words ‘... a lovely holiday’ was added on so as to precede that original text (the text starting with the words ‘reported saying ...’). Put simply: all I did, as the text starting with the words ‘I like Buddha, because ...’ was added simultaneous to the text starting with ‘Monks ...’ being added (which is the text wherein Mr. Gotama the Sakyan exclaims about scarpering off to the place where the sun don’t shine as a way of dealing with the human condition) was to re-present it in its chronological sequence. In just what way does my chronologically-sequenced re-presentation make it read like it did not already read?

RESPONDENT: You have got to be kidding right?

RICHARD: No, you averred that the way I had restructured those messages it [quote] ‘reads like No. 103 praising Buddha for disappearing up his own ring’ [endquote] so I explained, in detail, how all I did was to re-present the text of those two e-mails in the chronological sequence it was written in.

RESPONDENT: You took two separate messages and then spliced them together in a format that makes it appear as if the one is a reply to the other ...

RICHARD: If I might point out? The second of those two e-mails (which arrived in my mail-box 13 minutes after the first) was an add-on to the first and all I did was re-present the added-on text in the chronological sequence it was written in.

Here, see for yourself:

1. First e-mail (October 06, 2005 08:35 PDT): http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=912561612

2. Second e-mail (October 06, 2005 08:47 PDT): http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=912561648

RESPONDENT: ... and now you ask just in what way your ‘re-presentation’ makes it read like it did not already read?

RICHARD: Of course I do ... my chronologically-sequenced re-presentation does *not* make it read any different to what it already read.

RESPONDENT: Backtrack a sec please. Why did you find it necessary to ... uhmmm ... dick around ‘re-presenting’ and rearranging them to make it look like one was a reply to the other when you might just as easily have made your point without doing so?

RICHARD: As all I did was re-present the text of two e-mails in the chronological sequence it was written in then your characterisation – ‘to spend time idly; fool around; to be sexually promiscuous’ (American Heritage® Dictionary) – is entirely un-called for.

I notice that you wrote the following only recently:

• [Respondent]: ‘(...) I don’t like much of *what I see* of the actualist solution either, quite honestly, as it is in practice’. [emphasis added]. (Saturday 8/10/2005 10:37 PM AEST).

Quite frankly, you would be far better off not liking any of what you see, of the actualist solution in practice, as what you see sucks big-time.

October 09 2005

RESPONDENT (to Respondent No. 36): (...) I am chipping in here because I think Richard will play with you as a cat plays with mice. If you want a straight answer, here it is: Richard is promoting something entirely different from what you are living/teaching ...

RICHARD: And I am chipping in here because of what you think ... my very first e-mail to your co-respondent is to be found at the following URL:

http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=905191077

Just in case you cannot access it here it is in its entirety:

• [Respondent No. 36]: ‘I ran across Richard, Peter and Alan’s websites which were delightful to read by the way, very nice indeed. I plan on reading them some more. I liked the music too. I’d like to share some of the stuff, if you don’t mind on my own mailing list, The End of the Rope Ranch, if that’s alright with you guys. Some very good stuff there. Anyway, I wanted to drop in and say hi!

• [Richard]: ‘Welcome to The Actual Freedom Mailing List, No. 36. I accessed the link you provided and it may be apposite to point out early in the piece that an actual freedom is a non-spiritual freedom ... it lies beyond spiritual enlightenment and thus is not at all compatible with what is popularly known as the non-dual perspective.

I look forward with interest, therefore, to your considered appraisal when you do read some more of the web pages and see for yourself what I mean’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 6 September 2002).

If you could explain just how that up-front and out-in-the-open response of mine is me playing [quote] ‘as a cat plays with mice’ [endquote] it would be most appreciated.

CO-RESPONDENT: Don’t mind me chirping in ... thankyou ... now that unnecessary formalities are out of the way ... No. 60 was spot on; instead of answering No. 36, you have answered No. 60 .... is that because you & your team of researchers are still doing the necessary research to counter No. 36’s accusations? You know: dig up old, out of context quotes in an attempt to malicely-free render her integrity/credibility null & void?

Do you play cat & mouse with No. 60 &/or No. 36 because more work is required for you to have No. 36 come out a pathetic second best in this debate, if that?

RICHARD: (01) http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=909714749 (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36, 15 March 2004).<snipped 12 further links> (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 53i, 9 October 2005).

RESPONDENT: I’ve gotta say, it all sounds pretty much like ‘dicking around’ to me.

It strikes me as somewhat peculiar that things that are critical of you and/or actualism tend to draw a very prompt, very thorough and doggedly persistent response (until the last line of the dialogue can read something like: good, I’m glad that has been sorted out then – or words to that effect, even if it clearly has not been sorted out at all) ... whereas, you show a good deal less persistence in finalising the matter when you and/or actualism are not directly being criticised (even if the matter is of much greater import ... as in someone being, according to you, the subject of a ‘massive delusion’, and teaching others how to become ‘massively deluded’ as well).

RICHARD: (01) http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=912506827 (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36a, 19 September 2005).

(02) http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=912509095 (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36a, 20 September 2005).

(03) http://lists.topica.com/lists/actualfreedom/read/message.html?mid=912510320 (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 36a, 20 September 2005a).

October 09 2005

RICHARD: (...) I notice that you wrote the following only recently:

[Respondent]: ‘(...) I don’t like much of *what I see* of the actualist solution either, quite honestly, as it is in practice’. [emphasis added].

Quite frankly, you would be far better off not liking any of what you see, of the actualist solution in practice, as what you see sucks big-time.

RESPONDENT: Good, I am glad the matter has been sorted out now, and I appreciate you acknowledging this. I have no further questions.

RICHARD: Excellent ... I will now get on with attending to some other e-mails which have been awaiting my attention all this while.

October 09 2005

RESPONDENT: The way you have restructured these messages, it reads like No. 103 praising Buddha for disappearing up his own ring ...

(...)

RICHARD: As all I did was re-present the text of the two e-mails in the chronological sequence it was written in then your characterisation – ‘to spend time idly; fool around; to be sexually promiscuous’ (American Heritage® Dictionary) – is entirely un-called for. I notice that you wrote the following only recently:

[Respondent]: ‘(...) I don’t like much of *what I see* of the actualist solution either, quite honestly, as it is in practice’. [emphasis added].

Quite frankly, you would be far better off not liking any of what you see, of the actualist solution in practice, as what you see sucks big-time.

RESPONDENT: Do you see a notable difference between these two statements:

1) I’ll shut up now.

2) I heartily endorse disappearing up one’s own anus as a solution to the ills of the human condition.

RICHARD: I have already clearly indicated that I could right from the get-go:

• [Respondent]: ‘To set the record straight, my ‘me too’ was a reference to the subject line ‘I’ll shut up now’ (which I thought would be obvious because all other text was stripped).

• [Richard]: ‘I was *well aware* (for that very reason) that what you were agreeing to was the subject line ... what I was responding to was your exclamatory encouragement. Viz.: [Respondent]: ‘... you sure livened things up around here!’. [emphasis added]. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 60g, 9 October 2005a).

The whole point of my response is your encouragement of an ex-pantheist’s (purported) livening-up of exchanges on this mailing list – an ex-pantheist whose interest is [quote] ‘not in newness’ [endquote] – and who has a demonstrated penchant for posting religio-spiritual/ mystico-metaphysical quotes/ links complete with a commentary ... such as observing that Mr. Gotama the Sakyan’s discourse on scarpering off to the place where the sun don’t shine is [quote] ‘just the right mix of *matter-of-fact-ness* an poetry’ [emphasis added], for example, and which discourse-plus-commentary you snipped-out completely, without even the slightest murmur, so as to exclaim that your co-respondent sure livened things up on this mailing list.

And, as virtually all you have been doing ever since is to tilt at every windmill that you see looming large upon the horizon, my guess is that it may very well be that both flaming and encouraging same is what you have nowadays reduced yourself to.

‘Tis only a guess, mind you.

October 10 2005

RICHARD: I notice that you wrote the following only recently:

[Respondent]: ‘(...) I don’t like much of *what I see* of the actualist solution either, quite honestly, as it is in practice’. [emphasis added].

Quite frankly, you would be far better off not liking any of what you see, of the actualist solution in practice, as what you see sucks big-time.

RESPONDENT: Do you see a notable difference between these two statements: 1) I’ll shut up now. 2) I heartily endorse disappearing up one’s own anus as a solution to the ills of the human condition.

RICHARD: I have already clearly indicated that I could right from the get-go:

• [Respondent]: ‘To set the record straight, my ‘me too’ was a reference to the subject line ‘I’ll shut up now’ (which I thought would be obvious because all other text was stripped).

• [Richard]: ‘I was *well aware* (for that very reason) that what you were agreeing to was the subject line ... what I was responding to was your exclamatory encouragement. Viz.: [Respondent]: ‘... you sure livened things up around here!’. [emphasis added]. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 60g, 9 October 2005a).

RESPONDENT: So ... in the messages’ original format, my words clearly meant (1), and you knew that at the time. Yet, in the way you chose to ‘re-present’ it, it implies (2), and you know that at the time, too, because you actually intended it.

RICHARD: Golly, I go away from the computer for seven-eight hours or so only to come back and find you still trying to get blood out of a stone.

There is no way I intended it to read that you [quote] ‘heartily endorse disappearing up one’s own anus as a solution to the ills of the human condition’ [endquote] as I was clearly making the point – as highlighted in the quoted text in that e-mail – that if Richard said a person is freed when they know what Mr. Gotama the Sakyan knows (the dimension where water, earth, fire, and wind have no footing and where the stars do not shine, the sun is not visible, the moon does not appear, darkness is not found) you would object loud and clear yet when someone else says it there is not a murmur from you ... only an exclamatory encouragement about a (purported) livening-up of exchanges on the mailing list.

Can you not comprehend by now that just because you read the following devious motive (further on in your e-mail) into my words it does not follow that what you see, as being my intention, somehow miraculously makes that seeing a fact? Viz.:

• [Respondent]: ‘Richard wins again. Yet another Buddhist crawls away and climbs up his own bum. Oh well, c’est la vie, I guess’. [endquote].

As it is preposterous to even think I would ever intend such a puerile deceit, let alone type that thought out and click ‘send’, I will re-post a question you added-on to your e-mail only 24 minutes later:

• [Respondent]: ‘What we’ve ended up with is a blatant MIS-re-presentation of both No. 103 and me, done by none other than you. To whose end?’ (Sunday 9/10/2005 7:04 PM AEST).

Not only to whose end but to what end (as in how on earth would it serve the very purpose of me going public in the first place were I to really resort to misrepresentations)?

The entire thrust of your argument is totally absurd.

October 10 2005

RICHARD: (...) I notice that you wrote the following only recently: [Respondent]: ‘(...) I don’t like much of *what I see* of the actualist solution either, quite honestly, as it is in practice’. [emphasis added]. Quite frankly, you would be far better off not liking any of what you see, of the actualist solution in practice, as what you see sucks big-time.

RESPONDENT: Good, I am glad the matter has been sorted out now, and I appreciate you acknowledging this. I have no further questions.

RICHARD: Excellent ... I will now get on with attending to some other e-mails which have been awaiting my attention all this while.

RESPONDENT: Oh okay. I really appreciate your defence of your reputation Richard ...

RICHARD: So that is what you have been busily attacking all this while ... a will-o’-the-wisp which exists only in the eyes of the beholders.

Has it not occurred to you that as reputation is dependent upon the same thing as fame is – other people’s opinions – one has to first value those opinions? Furthermore, has it not occurred to you that an identity’s opinion, no matter how well-informed, is of no significance whatsoever to a flesh and blood body sans identity in toto? Moreover, has it not occurred to you that reputation, just like fame, being dependent as it is upon the fickle nature of identities and their opinions, has no substantial worth? More to the point, has it not occurred to you that the reputation you are attacking is the reputation you ascribe?

In other words, not only are you attacking your own ascription ... you are taking my words to be a defence of that (your ascription).

RESPONDENT: ... you’ve done me a big favour donating your time to such a cause.

RICHARD: No, you were having a dialogue with yourself – going it alone full-throttle – on that topic ... I was not there whilst it was happening.

RESPONDENT: Good stuff mate.

RICHARD: Hmm ... and when all else fails drop back onto the rugged appeal of ockerism (as in c’mon now, fall into line and/or do the right thing and/or wake up to yourself and/or don’t be a wanker all your life and/or you’re not god almighty you know), eh?

Just because somebody happens to live/reside on the landmass known as Australia it does not necessarily make them an Aussie.

October 30 2005

RICHARD: Look, ‘he’ [the identity inhabiting this flesh and blood body back in 1981] was just a simple boy from the farm (not at all sophisticated) and what ‘he’ set about doing, consciously and with knowledge aforethought, was to deliberately imitate the actual – as experienced six months prior in a four-hour pure consciousness experience (PCE) – each moment again for as far as was humanly possible ... and there is nothing freakish about that, quite prosaic, action of consciously channelling all ‘his’ affective energy into the felicitous/ innocuous feelings whilst simultaneously being conscious [i.e., affectively aware] of the slightest diminution of such felicity/ innocuity. Indeed, as success begets success it becomes so laughably easy, to be happy and harmless, one does wonder what all the fuss is about.

RESPONDENT: The way Richard put it, it sounded like he was able to simply *choose* the way he felt, and seemed surprised that others could not.

RESPONDENT No. 68: It does sort of give that impression.

RICHARD: It does far more than merely give that impression ... it is precisely what I am saying. For a recent instance:

• [Richard]: ‘... it is your choice, and your choice alone, each moment again as to how you prefer to experience this moment of being alive (the only moment you are ever alive)’. [endquote].

RESPONDENT: That being the case, all that would be necessary is to stay aware, stay alert to what is felt, and if one catches oneself feeling something less than <good, excellent, perfect> one could just elect to feel <good, excellent, perfect> again. Gosh. No wonder you say this method is so simple, and you wonder what all the fuss is about.

RICHARD: Aye, it is so very simple that some find its radicality hard to understand ... for instance:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘(...) After all, that’s the whole point of this, isn’t it? Not just to unravel the accrued identity, but to be happy and harmless. The method is incredibly simple: I am not happy now; I was happy a minute/ hour/ year ago; Ascertain what caused me to stop being happy; Get back to being happy as quickly as possible. No wonder this is so radical – it has none of the trappings and dogma that humans seem to need to create around such an elemental concept. Of course, sometimes simple things are the hardest to understand’. (Tuesday 6/05/2003 11:22 PM AEST).

Or that its utter simplicity escapes them:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘I have spent a lot of the last 18 months thinking about actualism, but the utter simplicity of it has escaped me. Let me take a snapshot before it flies away again. The idea is to spend as much time as possible feeling good, great, excellent or perfect. The universe itself needs no work, it is already fine. The peak experience shows that when we are okay the universe is perfect beyond compare. Human life can be fantastic. The universe doesn’t need to be improved before people can be happy. All we have to do is eliminate our own misery and malice, which resides right here in the breast (or brain stem)’. (Sunday 1/05/2005 11:44 AM AEST).

RESPONDENT: Speaking for myself alone now ... it does not work/has not worked that way. Why I do not know, but I would like to find out.

RICHARD: Simply this: the method you have been applying is not the method on offer on The Actual Freedom Trust web site.

(...)

RESPONDENT: I do not experience it as possible to choose how I am feeling at any given moment.

RICHARD: If it be not you who is doing that choosing then who is? For instance: who was it who chose to [quote] ‘feel continually wretched and frustrated and miserable’ [endquote] whilst trying to hoist themself into the air by their shoelaces if it was not you? And who, for another instance, preferred to [quote] ‘gradually yet persistently add feelings of frustration and bewilderment’ [endquote], at the fact that the method you have been applying was not working, if not you?

Or, for yet another instance, who is it that decides, on occasion, to deal with the vicissitudes of life by [quote] ‘throwing a tantrum’ [endquote] if it be not you?

October 30 2005

RESPONDENT: Nay. Feelings happen involuntarily ...

RICHARD: You may have missed the following yesterday as it was in a post to another:

• [Respondent]: ‘The way Richard put it, it sounded like he was able to simply *choose* the way he felt, and seemed surprised that others could not.
(...)
• [Richard]: ‘... the identity in residence in 1981 was not surprised that others could not but, rather, that others would not (having a victim mentality, it turned out, ran much deeper than the singular mentation such nomenclature indicates). Much, much deeper ... so much so as to be past fixation, entrenchment, and well into being an impressment, an embedment bordering on an embodiment. (...) It all depends upon whether one is going to continue to be a victim of one’s moods or a victor – or, in the jargon, whether one is going to take charge of one’s life, in this regard, or not – and, yes, that too is a choice.
Your felicity and innocuity, or lack thereof, is in your hands and your hands alone’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 68d, 29 October 2005).

RESPONDENT: ... incidentally, Richard, how can they be ‘an hereditary occurrence’ and be of my choosing at the same time?

RICHARD: You do comprehend that you are your feelings/ your feelings are you (‘I’ am ‘my’ feelings and ‘my’ feelings are ‘me’) do you not? Viz.:

• [Respondent]: ‘It has taken me a hell of a long time to understand the difference between *having* feelings and *being* those feelings. Because I have not clearly understood this, I’ve never quite got the hang of paying attention to feelings without praise or blame, and without notions of innocence and culpability, right and wrong, etc getting in the way.
This makes things very interesting. The moment I regard my ‘self’ as ‘having’ a feeling, I’m split down the middle and there’s a secondary reaction on the part of the social identity (an urge to "do something" about the feeling, which in turn evokes more feelings, and so on). Conversely, if I recognise that I *am* the feeling, it most often dissolves into thin air – and usually pretty quickly too.
This is great. It’s especially helpful with regard to anger and frustration which have been two of my biggest hurdles to date. Previously, when I caught myself being angry, annoyed or frustrated, identifying and paying attention to this feeling would NOT cause it to disappear. On the contrary, the feeling and the awareness of myself as ‘having’ it would sometimes become like a microphone and amplifier locked into a screaming feedback loop.
I’m really pleased that this is no longer happening. It seems almost too easy’. [emphasis in original]. (Thursday 28/10/2004 6:55 PM AEST).

And again there is a reference to how ‘almost too easy’ actualism is.

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P.S.: Just as a matter of interest: your own answer to that ‘screaming feedback loop’, which was such an issue for you in May-June this year (2005), has been sitting there in that October 2004 post all along.

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October 30 2005

RESPONDENT: Richard, *IF* it is possible for anyone to feel excellent simply by choosing to feel excellent, why aren’t they?

RICHARD: Why ask me (and not them)?

RESPONDENT: It is not as if people through the ages have not wanted/ tried to feel good, is it?

RICHARD: No ... yet mostly when I have asked others they generally come out with some variation on the hoary ‘you can’t change human nature’ adage.

RESPONDENT: What was the difference between you and them?

RICHARD: I am none too sure there was any difference: I was a normal person; I was born of normal parents; I had normal siblings; I had a normal upbringing; I attended a normal (state) school; I obtained a normal occupation; I had a normal wife; I had normal children ... and so on and so forth.

RESPONDENT: The way you describe it, it wasn’t even that much of a struggle for you (found the secret to life inside the first three months???).

RICHARD: It was inside the first few weeks, actually, of putting into action what was startlingly evident in the four-hour pure consciousness experience (PCE) which had finally provided the direction my otherwise following-the-herd way of living was singularly lacking (although there was a six-month incubation period between the PCE and the application thereof).

I distinctly recall informing my then-wife at the time that I had ‘done it their way’, for 34 years and to no avail, and that it was high-time I did it my way (and when she asked what way that was I said that I did not know but that it would become progressively apparent with each step I took).

RESPONDENT: So why haven’t millions of others discovered that they can feel excellent by choosing to ...

RICHARD: Quite possibly – and I am not being facetious here – they were/ are waiting for someone else to do it/ show the way (for, despite many peoples huff-and-puff about leaders, there have always been pioneers, who have blazed the trails others follow, and always will be).

RESPONDENT: ... unless, of course, they can’t ...

RICHARD: It is not so much a case of they can not but, rather, that they will not.

RESPONDENT: ... [unless, of course, they can’t] without a radical shift in their understanding of self/ world/ reality *engendering* such change?

RICHARD: My experience with the peoples who have chosen to give felicity/ innocuity a go is, as a generalisation, that the necessary paradigm shift has usually been a gradual process of comprehension – not necessarily an instantaneous shift – and which paradigmatical change commences because of that choice ... and that choice mainly comes after a gestation period (which itself follows intelligent appraisal/ thoughtful consideration).

And, by way of personal example, I need only point to the six-month incubation period already mentioned.

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P.S.: For what it is worth: a true rebel wears their motorbike helmet (for instance) without any protest/ without any resentment whatsoever.

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November 01 2005

RESPONDENT: Richard, you are right. I am wrong. This is one of those occasions when I am happy to be an ass. I am my feelings, my feelings are me. And most importantly: yes, I can choose how I feel.

This is how I’m grokking it now: Experiencing myself/ thinking of myself as an entity who has feelings is indicative of being in a mildly dissociative state. The ‘normal’ state is mildly dissociative, right?

RICHARD: It is indeed ... for instance:

• [Richard]: ‘... one needs to *be* a psyche (in order to intuitively/ psychically feel the presence, or the lack thereof, of another psyche). As I only get to meet flesh and blood bodies here in this actual world I can only take another’s word for it that they experience themself to be an identity ... albeit usually in a dissociated way (by saying they have one). (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 103b, 24 October 2005a).

RESPONDENT: From that mildly dissociated state, feelings are something that happen, something that I react to. The dissociated ‘I’ is indeed quite powerless to reach in and change the feeling substrate because that ‘I’ is insubstantial; it is a cluster of images/ ideals/ identifying tokens etc, whereas feelings (although not actual) constitute the real, organic, living ‘being’ itself. So a mildly dissociated person trying to change an underlying feeling state is roughly analogous to a shadow trying to exert physical force upon a real-world object. And because I am identified with the one who is trying to exert this force, and because this force is quite ineffectual, it generates frustration, and eventually exasperation and anger.

RICHARD: To the point of it escalating, on occasion, into that ‘screaming feedback loop’ which was such an issue for you in May-June this year (2005), eh?

RESPONDENT: (I could, and did for a while, get relief from this frustration by being further dissociated, less inclined to try to change anything, more inclined to just happily accept whatever must be).

RICHARD: And that method – gaining relief by being further dissociated/ by not changing anything/ by accepting whatever must be – is, in a nutshell, the essence of the religio-spiritual/ mystico-metaphysical approach to the human condition/ the ills of humankind.

RESPONDENT: But if I understand that I am this whole package, the whole feeling being, as opposed to identifying with just the fragment of self who is assumed to have feelings, then choosing the way I feel is equivalent to simply OPTING TO BE A DIFFERENT WAY at this moment in time. And that is a different ball-game altogether. That is do-able. That is easy!

RICHARD: It is indeed easy ... and, when the choice to give felicity/ innocuity a go becomes (via its ensuing paradigmatical change) the default position, as it were, opting to be a different way at this moment is then as simple as letting go of whatever other way of being may have inadvertently crept in under the radar, so to speak, and !Hey Presto! happiness/ harmlessness appears of its own accord.

And that happiness/ harmlessness readily enables a straight-forward sussing out of where, when, how, why – and what for – that other way of being came about.

RESPONDENT: Instead of paying attention to feelings, trying to somehow induce (or allow or facilitate) felicitous ones and avoid other ones, I can just choose to BE different in the way I approach the living of this moment. IOW, feeling-as-‘me’ and ‘me’-as-feeling are not passive and helpless like they are in a dissociative state. A feeling being isn’t powerless to influence itself, but a dissociated fragment thereof is quite powerless.

RICHARD: Sometimes to the point of being so powerless that submission/ surrender becomes the only option.

RESPONDENT: In practical terms this insight is only about 40 minutes old, so I’m not totally sure about all the details ... and I hope I’ve expressed it in a way that is comprehensible. I would appreciate some feedback here because if this is roughly how it works, and it seems to be so far, it would explain a lot.

Any comments welcome.

RICHARD: Just this: seeing the fact (that ‘I’ am ‘my’ feelings and ‘my’ feelings are ‘me’/ that it is ‘my’ choice as to how ‘I’ experience this moment) enables sincerity, as to be in accord with the fact/ being aligned with factuality/ staying true to facticity is what being sincere is (being authentic/ guileless, genuine/ artless, straightforward/ ingenuous), and to be sincere is to be the key which unlocks naiveté ... an aspect of oneself locked away in childhood through ridicule, derision, and so on, which one has dared not to resurrect for fear of appearing foolish, a simpleton.

Yet without naiveté – the nearest a ‘self’ can get to innocence whilst remaining a ‘self’ – pure intent will remain still-born.


CORRESPONDENT No. 60 (Part Nine)

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