|
Vineeto’s Correspondence on the Actual Freedom List Correspondent No 72
RESPONDENT: All those who have been practising actualism for some time, has their a been a positive change in your behaviour and fundamentally in your character? VINEETO: The change is so fundamental, not only in my character but in all that
is entailed in being an identity, that I can confidently say I am not the same person I used to be before I started with
actualism. I have written about the experience RESPONDENT: Do the others around you feel that as well (about you i.e.)? VINEETO: People who I meet regularly, in my work for instance, often comment that I am always happy and Peter finds me excellent company for 24hours a day. Many of the people, however, who knew me well before I started practicing actualism, initially considered my change as being negative, i.e. disloyal, irreverent and iconoclastic, because I did abandon my spiritual beliefs and practices whilst they still cherish them. Apart from what people tell me, the main difference is that I now like people-as-they-are as fellow human beings, I have no arguments or fights with them and in any interchanges I always look for a mutual win-win situation if possible, I enjoy their company, I am good company to myself so I make no demands on others and I no longer create an emotional atmosphere with either antagonistic, surly or gloomy vibes. RESPONDENT: Are you more happy, harmless and feel delightful during your daily activities, in your day to day life? VINEETO: Definitely, that’s the whole idea. Contrary to what some may imagine, the process of actualism is not an all-or-nothing, life-will-be-miserable-unless/until-I-am-free approach – it is a day-to-day increase in attentiveness, the very tool to progressively dismantle ‘me’, the spoiler who stands in the way of the sensate experiencing of being fully alive in the actual world. RESPONDENT: Also has it has had any effect on the body, I mean more energetic etc…? VINEETO: Particularly in the first year of practicing actualism I noticed a significant change in my physical well-being as my psychosomatic symptoms disappeared one after the other. As I incrementally abandoned my fears and beliefs about all sorts of quackery, pseudo-medicine and fashionable health-scares, and even more importantly as stress disappeared out of my life, I am definitely a healthier person with a vital interest in life and the universe. RESPONDENT: … and in light of a post today (R: Case <name deleted>) does this method throw up such risks? VINEETO: The disclaimer on The Actual Freedom Trust homepage clearly states, that actualism is for normal people, sensible human beings who understand what a word means, who have learned to function prudently in society with all its legal laws and social protocols, and who are a reasonably ‘well-adjusted’ personality who have a deep-seated interest in finding ultimate fulfilment and complete satisfaction. As for risks – there are, of course, risks that one might loose courage on the way to becoming free and choose to remain trapped in one or the other mental-emotional states that pass for being ‘normal’ or ‘spiritual’ but by far the greatest risk in practicing actualism is what Peter has called ‘grounding on the Rock of Enlightenment’. To be seduced off the path to an actual freedom into the institutionalized delusion of a permanent altered state of consciousness is a real risk and a warning that I did not discard lightly. Whilst practicing actualism and investigating the root of the so-called ‘good’ emotions I experienced a few altered states of consciousness, some of which lasted for several hours and one for more than a day. After these experiences I made it a point to become acutely aware of the ‘self’-aggrandizing symptoms of this passionate trap in order to be able to recognize the warning signs and nip any onsets in the bud. Be that as it may, the risk that most people I have spoken to or written to seem to fear most is to commit themselves wholeheartedly to something, particularly if this something will result in irrevocable change.
VINEETO: Apart from what people tell me, the main difference is that I now like people-as-they-are as fellow human beings, I have no arguments or fights with them and in any interchanges I always look for a mutual win-win situation if possible, I enjoy their company, I am good company to myself so I make no demands on others and I no longer create an emotional atmosphere with either antagonistic, surly or gloomy vibes. RESPONDENT: That’s great to hear! I have read your journal and have read the statements of you and Peter that you feel happy and more alive etc. and hence I addressed my query to the others! Same thing should occur to others as well, namely people should get more happy, feeling good and a joy to be with along the way. The intent and motivation of the investigation being that. VINEETO: Not to forget the intent and motivation to become harmless – after all, actualism is about actualizing peace on earth, in this lifetime, as this flesh and blood body. RESPONDENT: So just wanted to check up. I also see couple of other attestations at https://www.actualfreedom.com.au/richard/articles/somepersonalattestations.htm (btw where and how are Alan and Mark now? Any idea Vineeto?) Plus other actualists cores as well. VINEETO: I notice that both Alan and Mark are still subscribed to the mailing
list so I’ll leave it to you ask them for yourself. Additionally, there is a section of * RESPONDENT: … and in light of a post today (R: Case <name deleted>) does this method throw up such risks? VINEETO: The disclaimer on The Actual Freedom Trust homepage clearly states, that actualism is for a normal people, sensible human beings who understand what a word means, who have learned to function prudently in society with all its legal laws and social protocols, and who is a reasonably ‘well-adjusted’ personality who has a deep-seated interest in finding ultimate fulfilment and complete satisfaction. As for risks – there are, of course, risks that one might loose courage on the way to becoming free and choose to remain trapped in one or the other mental-emotional states that pass for being ‘normal’ or ‘spiritual’ but by far the greatest risk in practicing actualism is what Peter has called ‘grounding on the Rock of Enlightenment’. To be seduced off the path to an actual freedom into the institutionalized delusion of a permanent altered state of consciousness is a real risk and a warning that I did not discard lightly. Whilst practicing actualism and investigating the root of the so-called ‘good’ emotions I personally experienced a few altered states of consciousness, some of which lasted for several hours and one for more than a day. After these experiences I made it a point to become acutely aware of the ‘self’-aggrandizing symptoms of this passionate trap in order to be able to recognize the warning signs and nip any onsets in the bud. RESPONDENT: Yeah I can see the need to be vigilant. And that’s why I asked the query about risks of mental health, just as you have no intention or wish to go enlightened way! I have no intention or wish to go crazy. Some stuff pertaining to this issue (and my worries) can be read at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/reith2003/lecture5.shtml VINEETO: The link you provided gives a general overview about many possible
types of mental disorders. Some people have queried Richard about what is described as ‘Capgras delusion’, which is a
result of the non-functioning of the amygdala, whereas Richard describes the change that made him actually free from the
instinctual passions happening in the brain-stem. If you read more of Richard’s writings you can recognize for yourself that an
actual freedom has nothing at all to do with this particular illness. However, you may be interested to know that an actual
freedom has been classified by psychiatrists as being afflicted with a chronic and incurable psychotic mental disorder – not
only depersonalisation and derealisation but anhedonia and alexithymia as well. In Richard’s selected correspondence on Personally, I can understand your concerns very well as I had a short period where I was genuinely afraid of going mad myself. The only thing that helped me to overcome my fear was to have straightforward to-the-point discussions with the two only actualists at the time, Peter and Richard, about the nature of the human condition, about the all-pervasiveness of the instinctual survival passions, about the cunning of my ‘self’ and about the delusion of spiritualism. It then dawned on me that what they were saying made sense – in other words, that what they were saying was simple, sensible, straight-forward, matter of fact and down-to-earth. My determination to get to the bottom of the matter finally resolved the issue of sanity and insanity when my ‘self’ temporarily disappeared and I had a pure consciousness experience. In fact, it was my burning desire to know for sure who was right and who was crazy that brought my inquiry to a peak and caused the bubble of ‘me’ to temporarily burst. This particular pure consciousness experience confirmed, without doubt, that an actual freedom from the human condition (the extinction of both ego and soul) is the only salubrious solution to bringing an end to my malice and my sorrow. If society, in its wisdom, classifies someone who is free of malice and free of sorrow as having a chronic and incurable psychotic mental disorder, then what to do – stay ‘sane’? * VINEETO: Be that as it may, the risk that most people I have spoken to or written to seem to fear most is to commit themselves wholeheartedly to something, particularly if this something will result in irrevocable change. RESPONDENT: I will tell you what my fear is. I am quite a happy and cheerful guy, I mostly feel its stupid to be sad, mostly sorrow seems to self generated, imagined ones and by accepting the society norms and then unable to live up to it, the divide between the ‘goal, the ideal’ and where I am now, brings sorrow. Take ‘success’ for e.g. or any of the other norms that exist in values or material field. That much is clear. VINEETO: There is much more to being unconditionally happy than being disillusioned with society’s goals and ideals, much, much more. RESPONDENT: Am I harmless, definitely not, not always. Am I always happy, no. Why not? DO I have the clarity of the ways of what and how to live, No. VINEETO: The question at this point would be if your realization that you are not always happy and ‘definitely not’ always harmless is motivation enough for you to want to change and change radically. RESPONDENT: So for clarity one looks into various
avenues. I want to do the right thing; In my teens I rmbr keeping a diary for sometime, and I rmbr writing what if I was first man
on earth, then concept of God goes, (of course I would have imagined and created one soon enough!) the so called values
materialistic and religious, of the society goes, that gave me a huge release, in a sense that even now nothing has changed, I
don’t have to follow all the aims and ambitions that culture places before me and feel disappointed or sad when I don’t meet
them. Richard writes I have been pondering over this recently, there doesn’t seem to be anything, any power that guides one through the journey of life, there are few individuals who seem to have got somewhere and say this is the way, this is the right thing to do, or alternatively there is nothing to do, this is your destiny, etc. I have tried moving away but I keep coming back to it again and again, An unexamined life is second rate living. But what if tomorrow somebody else comes and says with certainty that what Richard says is all wrong, it’s just a brain damage or altered state! I see the predicament of living on borrowed word, borrowed ideas, it has to be a self lived, certainty can come from that only. Why do I believe in what Richard says or anybody else of those gurus for that matter. Then of course the thought aimed at oneself pops up, that’s fine sunshine! But he is saying ‘you’ are just a idea, a bundle of beliefs, just a biochemical discharge even! And now shouldn’t you be questioning, investigating and finding out, isn’t that what you wanted to do while you were young and looking at the stars lying down on the beach and wondering what’s all this about? VINEETO: Okay, it strikes you that an unexamined life is second rate living and you have a certain amount of suspicion and doubt about the traditional spiritual ‘freedom’ based on your personal experience with some of the spiritual ways. You read some of what is written on the Actual Freedom Trust website and it makes sense to you. The next step is to find out, for yourself, if what Richard and Peter and Vineeto are saying is factual and it is my experience that the only way to find out the facts for yourself is to dare to set in motion your very own process of ‘self’-investigation, a process which will inevitably result in you remembering having had a PCE or evoking one afresh. RESPONDENT: Here in AF the starting point is a nice one, happy and harmless, what’s preventing me from that at this moment. I shall end my rambling here. Thanks for the mail VINEETO: Nice to chat with you.
VINEETO to No 66: … The idea that one is merely ‘attached’ to one’s emotions is an invention of Eastern spiritualism and a particularly persistent and popular one at that. This theory is integral to the notion that the way to become ‘free’ is to become detached from one’s unwanted feelings (as well as from the corporeal body and the physical world). Becoming detached from one’s unwanted or undesirable feelings inevitably leads to dissociation – the prerequisite to delusionary states such as enlightenment. This is not what actualism is about – it is impossible to be attentive to the operation of feelings emotions and passions that one is busily being detached from or feeling dissociated from. Actualism clearly recognizes that ‘I’ am my feelings and my feelings are ‘me’, which is ‘me’ at the core of my ‘being’ and one’s own attentiveness will reveal that this is so. Whenever I am feeling annoyed, it is ‘me’ that is feeling annoyed – ‘I’ am the feeling of annoyance and the feeling of annoyance is ‘me’ in operation as it were. Whenever I am feeling sad, it is ‘me’ that is feeling sad – ‘I’ am the feeling of sadness and the feeling of sadness is ‘me’ in operation as it were … and so on. If one is detached in any way from any of the feelings that are ‘me’ then it is
impossible to understand, let alone actively investigate, how ‘I’ am operating at this moment. RESPONDENT: Cheers to you Madam! Thanks for an excellent clarifying post on the above issues I was grappled with as well. Can you go little further into the investigation process, let’s say I am slightly fearful right now, thinking about my future, how will my job go or angry at something or whatever. So I am my emotion (whatever it maybe) there and I turn my attention to that, usually I would reckon, if the emotion is not strong, it would dissipate by the very attention process; anyway I verbalise that emotion, see the cause of it and the functioning of ‘me’ and leave it at that? Just by understanding and attentive to the process and by not expressing or repressing that emotion, I am not giving into the flow of mind, the strength to it and it (I?) ceases to be. Hmm? VINEETO: Whenever a feeling or an emotion or a passion is exposed to the bright
light of awareness, then one has a clear choice – and when you are determined to make becoming happy and harmless your prime
goal in life then the choice is always obvious. For a detailed description of the investigation process I recommend reading (and
re-reading) Richard’s article
RESPONDENT: So it’s not I am annoyed, or I am angry, rather I am Anger. Let me go into this process and see for myself and I shall keep reporting here and maybe troubling Richard, you, Peter, and other actualists a bit. VINEETO: Yep, when I am angry then ‘I am anger’ as opposed to the spiritual self-observation exercise of ‘there is anger arising’ or ‘I am watching myself experiencing anger’ or ‘anger is happening to this body but that’s not me’. By admitting that ‘I’ am anger I avoid both dissociating from the feeling as well as blaming someone else or some event (be it current or past) for my feelings – instead I pay attention to what kind of feeling I am feeling while it is happening in order to gain valuable information as to how ‘I’ tick, which in turn helps to prevent the same automatic emotive reaction at the next trigger event. Of course, in this process I give up more and more of ‘my’ precious identity. It’s all quite simple, really.
RESPONDENT: Btw has Richard ever appeared on a telly show or radio in Australia or elsewhere? Has he gone public with AF in any other form than this site? VINEETO: Richard has published a book, now in its 2nd edition, and has written on several mailing lists in the past years, the correspondence of which can be found on the Actual Freedom Trust website. The written word is proving adequate to pass on the message that one can become free from the human condition, given sufficient intent and diligence.
RESPONDENT: Have your memories undergone a change? VINEETO: Yes, most of my emotional memories have faded or disappeared completely once the emotional issues that sustained these memories – and that these memories in turn sustained –were dealt with at their core. RESPONDENT: Since actualism, is the attention to the experience of the moment, ‘here’, you won’t be ‘roaming’ mentally, emotionally much; how is your emotional memory now? Are you always ‘here’? VINEETO: Yes, I am always here in that daydreaming has stopped completely, neither do I imagine scenarios in the future nor waste this moment by indulging in past memories. I remember when I realized the fact I am always here I was shocked – I desperately tried to ‘leave this moment’ and go somewhere else and I even stuck my head under the blanket trying to imagine myself somewhere else but it proved impossible. With imagination having lost its seductive and convincing power I found I am here, no matter what the situation, and consequently I decided that I might as well do whatever it takes to enjoy being here, in this, the non-imaginary world-as-it-is with all the other non-imaginary people-as-they-are. RESPONDENT: What’s the first thought when you wake up?! VINEETO: Something like: ah, it’s time to get up. Mmhmm, what’s the weather like? I wonder what will happen today… RESPONDENT: Do you have to rmbr to practice attention first thing upon waking? VINEETO: Not any more. The on-switch for attention stays on permanently nowadays and should an emotion interfere with my being happy and harmless, investigative questions automatically kick in. In the meantime when nothing is ‘going on’, as it were, and I am feeling excellent, attentiveness automatically ensures an on-going awareness of all of the sensate pleasures that simply being alive has to offer. Vineeto’s & Richard’s Text ©The Actual Freedom Trust: 1997-. All Rights Reserved.
Disclaimer |
