VINEETO: Thank you for your order. We will send the books off as soon as your money order arrives.

RESPONDENT: The pleasant surprise is on my side, when I found out that I am not alone being working to rid me from the human conditioning. In my case: I am long time aware that I am the creator of my own reality and that it is thinking itself which is the link to that reality. In time, like a detective, I figured that not only the negative feelings but also the positive feelings are my own creation and for that can be dropped.

Well, that’s how I also found your web site and I am supported by your sharing your insight’s. Cool.

VINEETO: You might find, when you read more into Peter’s and Richard’s Journal and our correspondence, that Actual Freedom is not only about ridding oneself of the Human Conditioning, which I understand to be the socialisation and beliefs one accumulates in the course of one’s life, but also the elimination of feelings, emotions and instincts, the whole of the Human Condition.

Only at first sight it might look similar to the spiritual approach – spirituality talks of ego and mind as the problem but it leaves the soul, being, watcher and Consciousness intact. It never questions the identity of who one ‘feels’ one is. Spirituality believes in the ‘spirit’, in an inner world of feelings, love, compassion, with an inner identity, ‘the watcher’. What is usually completely overlooked is that there is not only an ‘ego’ controlling our thoughts, but also a ‘soul’ producing our emotions. They both have to be eliminated in order to experience actual freedom. Only without the constructs of instincts, emotions and beliefs can the magnificent perfection of actuality be experienced, and then it is self-evident and obvious. No devastating truth or a mystery to be lost in – just this abundant life in this infinite universe, experienced through the physical senses.

When both, the ego and the soul, the ‘self’ and the ‘Self’ (as in Love, Bliss, Consciousness, Compassion, Oneness) are eliminated, one is only this flesh and blood body, being the eyes seeing and the ears hearing, being the universe experiencing itself as a human being.

You seem to have experimented with questioning love and the positive feelings. I am intrigued to hear more about your discoveries.

To give you a ‘compressed’ idea of what Actual Freedom is about I copied a nine point description from Richard:

1. Richard: ‘There are three ways of experiencing the world of people, things and events: 1. sensate (senses); 2. cerebral (thoughts); 3. affective (feelings). The feelings include both the affectionate and desirable emotions/ passions (those that are loving and trusting) and hostile and invidious emotions/ passions (those that are hateful and fearful).
2. All sentient beings are born with instinctual passions like fear and aggression and nurture and desire genetically bestowed by blind nature which give rise to a rudimentary animal ‘self’ – which is ‘being’ itself – that human beings with their ability to think and reflect upon their mortality have transformed into a ‘me’ as soul (a ‘feeler’ in the heart) and an ‘I’ as ego (a ‘thinker’ in the head).
3. Thus there are three I’s altogether but only one is actual (sensate) and not an identity; I am this flesh and blood body being apperceptively aware. The primary cause of all the wars and murders and rapes and tortures and domestic violence and child abuse and suicides and so on is the instinctual passions which give rise to malice and sorrow and the antidotally generated pacifiers of love and compassion which, if sublimated and transcended, give rise to Love Agapé and Divine Compassion. This ‘Tried and True’ solution to all the ills of humankind lies within the ‘Human Condition’ and, as it has had 3,000 to 5,000 years to demonstrate its efficacy, can be discarded as being the ‘Tried and Failed’.
4. I am mortal in that I was born, I live for a period of years, then I die and death is the end, finish. The material universe is infinite and eternal and was here before I was born and will be here after I die.
5. There are three worlds altogether but only one is actual; there is nothing other than this actual, physical universe (the normal ‘reality’ as experienced by 6.0 billion human beings is an illusion and the abnormal ‘Reality’ as experienced by 0.0000001 of the population is a delusion born out of the illusion because of the self-aggrandising tendency of the narcissism born of the survival instincts).
6. Peace-on-earth can become apparent to anyone at all irregardless of gender, age or race because the perfection of the infinitude of this spatial and temporal universe is already always here at this place in infinite space ... now at this moment in eternal time.
7. When ‘I’ as ego and ‘me’ as soul psychologically and psychically self-immolate – which is the end of ‘being’ itself – then the answer to the ‘Mystery Of Life’ becomes evident as an on-going existential experiencing; I am this physical universe experiencing itself as a reflective, sensate human being; as me, the universe is intelligent (there is no anthropomorphic ‘Intelligence’ that is creating or running existence).
8. There is a wide and wondrous path to actual freedom: One asks oneself, each moment again, ‘how am I experiencing this moment of being alive’? This gives rise to apperception. Apperception is the outcome of the exclusive attention paid to being alive right here and now. Apperception is to be the senses as a bare awareness, a pure consciousness experience (PCE) of the world as-it-is, which happens when the mind becomes aware of itself. Apperception is an awareness of consciousness. It is not ‘I’ being aware of ‘me’ being conscious; it is the mind’s awareness of itself.
9. The day finally dawns where the definitive moment of being here, right now, conclusively arrives; something irrevocable takes place and every thing and every body and every event is different, somehow, although the same physically; something immutable occurs and every thing and every body and every event is all-of-a-sudden undeniably actual, in and of itself, as a fact; something irreversible happens and an immaculate perfection and a pristine purity permeates every thing and every body and every event; something has changed forever, although it is as if nothing has happened, except that the entire world is a magical fairytale-like playground full of incredible gladness and a delight which is never-ending.
   Put succinctly: ‘my’ demise was as fictitious as ‘my’ apparent presence; I have always been here, in this actual world of sensorial delight, one realises, for it was that ‘I’ only imagined ‘I’ existed; ‘my’ presence had been but an emotional/ passional play in a fertile imagination; an emotional/ passional play which fuelled actual hormonal substances, however, triggered off from within the brain-stem by the instinctual emotions/ passions bestowed per favour blind nature. Thus the psyche – the entire affective faculty born of the survival instincts themselves – is wiped out forever and one is finally what one has actually been all along: a sensitive and reflective flesh-and-blood body simply brimming with sense organs revelling in this sensuous world of immediate experience. As this flesh-and-blood body only one is this infinite, eternal, and perdurable universe experiencing itself as an apperceptive human being ... as such it is stunningly aware of its own infinitude. And this is truly wonderful.

Thus the search for meaning amidst the debris of the much-vaunted human hopes and dreams and schemes has come to its timely end. With the end of both ‘I’ and ‘me’, the distance or separation between both ‘I’ and ‘me’ and these sense organs – and thus the external world – disappears. To be living as the senses is to live a clear and clean awareness – apperception – a pure consciousness experience of the world as-it-is. Because there is no ‘I’ as a thinker (a little person inside one’s head) or a ‘me’ as a feeler (a little person in one’s heart) – to have sensations happen to them, I am the sensations. The entire affective faculty vanishes ... blind nature’s software package of instinctual passions is deleted. There is nothing except the series of sensations which happen ... not happening to an ‘I’ or a ‘me’ but just happening ... moment by moment ... one after another. To live life as these sensations, as distinct from having them, engenders the most astonishing sense of freedom and magic. Consequently, I am living in peace and tranquillity; a meaningful peace and tranquillity. Life is intrinsically purposeful, the reason for existence lies openly all around. Being this very air I live in, I am constantly aware of it as I breathe it in and out; I see it, I hear it, I taste it, I smell it, I touch it, all of the time. It never goes away – nor has it ever been away – it was just that ‘I’ and/or ‘me’ was standing in the way of the meaning of life being apparent.

Life is not a vale of tears.’ Richard, Actual Freedom Mailing List, No 4, 14.1.1999

Looking forward to hearing from you.

25.7.1999

VINEETO: Aloha. Good to hear from you. I thought you might have fallen into one of those marvellous volcanoes on your island or fell off a surfboard. Just yesterday I saw one of the ‘Lonely Planet’ travel reports about the Hawaiian Islands – what a beautiful spot on the planet it is, magical and with immense variety, from rainforest to city, from ocean to active fire-mountains.

So, you are still interested in acquiring one or both of the journals about Actual Freedom?

RESPONDENT: Vineeto, what are the postage rate for both paperbacks going to the US, Hawaii? You still don’t accept charge cards? Aloha.

VINEETO: No, we still don’t have any facility for cards, the demand is not big enough for setting up a system, the costs would far exceed the income. If you want to buy the journals you will have to bite the bullet þ and visit a bank and get a cheque or money order, made out in Australian Dollars, and send it to

PO Box 1404

Byron Bay, NSW 2481 [now changed]

Australia.

Richard’s Journal is A$ 29.95,

Peter’s Journal is A$ 25.-

Postage for one book is A$ 12.-, for 2 books it is A$ 17.50

We did some inquiries earlier about receiving a money order made out in American Dollars, but the bank charges A$ 25 to convert to it to A$.

The Actual Freedom Trust is something completely new and in its infancy – we are but a handful of people interested in actually and practically freeing ourselves from malice and sorrow. It is not a very popular thing to do, eradicating the very thing you believed, thought and felt yourself to be. There are neither head-quarters nor international offices. We just got the books printed and two websites and a mailing list up and running because the ultimate and perfect solution to mankind’s problems of war and violence, sorrow and depression should not be kept secret.

Therefore most of the writing is in one way or other freely available on the websites, sorted by topics or as complete correspondence. Even if it should turn out to be too difficult for you to get to a bank with international service you still have ample opportunity to read and gather information about this new and non-spiritual down-to-earth Freedom. As one of the people who has experimented with it for two and a half years now I can only confirm that it works, it already has changed me irreversibly, even though the final extinction is still to come. I am a happy and harmless person but for a few shakes of fear, and my life has improved beyond my wildest and highest dreams.

I have tried to find whatever I have considered the best in life and pursued it in politics, religions, therapy and spirituality – I have found that Actual Freedom delivers the goods after everything else failed. In my first substantial peak experience, which I have described at length in ‘A Bit of Vineeto’, I knew with absolute certainty that this is what I was always looking for and nothing else would do. Since then I have been driven to dismantle and eliminate the cause of human malice and suffering in me, to uncover the beliefs, emotions and instincts of which the ‘self’ is made of and to come closer and closer to be the best I can be.

In the process of becoming free it is vital to remember a peak experience well enough, because this will be your landmark. In a PCE you experience the perfection and purity of the actual world and you also know that the only one standing in the road of this perfection is your ‘self’, your beliefs, emotions, feelings and instincts. This can spark off the intent to do something about this ‘self’, to change yourself radically, irreversible and ultimately – to sacrifice the ‘self’ for a life beyond one’s wildest dreams, full of magic and wonder, purity and sparkle, excellence and perfect harmony.

I am delighted to hear that you are still interested in Actual Freedom – somehow I can follow people’s fears and objections but never quite understand how everyone can compromise and settle for second best. So it is good to hear that another human being is interested to learn how to become free, completely and utterly free, from the Human Condition.

I am looking forward to hearing from you.

3.8.1999

VINEETO: Thank you for your post. It is great to hear that you are ‘on the freedom path’.

RESPONDENT: Yes I am still on the freedom path, actually it’s not a path anymore, it’s more are highway, quite fast in those days, and reading your lines about what it means to you, I don’t have to add or subtract much of it, to stand for myself.

So, meeting you guys was a helloooooo, I am not alone, like it could have seemed. And I got a big boost from the web site and from the mailing list. Because it’s really what matters to me.

VINEETO: You say, from what we are writing, you ‘don’t have to add or subtract much of it to stand for yourself’. I am very interested how that translates in day-to-day life for you, how an actual freedom from feeling, emotions, beliefs and instincts is showing results and success in your daily life. I am always interested to share notes with the few intrepid pioneers that dare to experiment with something new and non-spiritual, something unheard of in the familiar world of spirits and beliefs, hopes and fears. How is life with the world as-it-is and with people as-they-are?

Living and working ‘out in the world’ has always been the thermometer for me, so to speak; it is the test to find the various remainders of my cunning self, of my objections and complaints to being here, appearing as ‘if’s’ and ‘if only’s’. And what a pleasure to be alive it is now, and those if’s and only’s have almost completely disappeared, and I can simply enjoy things as they happen and people as-they-are.

Actual Freedom, for me, is distinctly different from the spiritual people ‘letting go’ of their ‘worldly’ ambitions, failures and achievements. In the process of becoming free of my instinctual programming and my social and religious conditioning I have achieved happiness beyond my wildest dreams, and I have fulfilled all the goals that I dreamt of in my youth – and much, much better and much, much more. I had fought for peace, hoped for a peaceful relationship, devoted most of my adult life to eliminating the ego, which I was told was the cause of fear, anger, greed, self-consciousness and of my continuous ups and downs. And I had always wanted to explore sex and enjoy it without guilt, fear or pretence.

Starting the journey to an actual freedom meant taking my life back into my own hands, abandoning the idea of surrender and devotion and the hope that someone else is going to fix me up, be it God, Guru or ‘Existence’. I re-defined my goals and set them higher than ever, seeing in Richard that being happy and harmless is indeed possible.

• I had wanted death of the ego, then why not go for a complete freedom from the self, and get rid of the soul as well?
• I was willing to accept a limited peace before, consisting of compromises and resignation, then why not aim for a peace that lasts, guaranteed by the final extinction of everything in me that could cause offence, conflict and separation.
• I had wanted the enjoyment of sex that used to be but a ceasefire in the perpetual battle of the sexes, fuelled and distorted by the innate instinct to secure the survival of the species – then why not sex as a mutual experience of ultimate sensual pleasure, freed from the instinctual drive, freed from aggression, resentment, guilt, fear or considerations of right, wrong, good and bad – and now I am completely free of any gender issues or conflicts that were so ever-present in the days of old.

So, you see, I am really curious what you mean by ‘letting go’, the expression being so dangerously close to the spiritual expression of letting go of the worldly desires, only to strive to achieve eternal bliss ...

Freedom for me is first and above all questioning everything I have ever been told to believe, investigating the underlying emotions and fears and changing my life in an active, actual and tangible way. And the ensuing success has proved the method right. In this process I have lost a lot of fears, beliefs, emotions, conditioning, not as a result of letting go but rather as a result of an overall new understanding of the very makings of ‘me’ and of my sincere intent to sacrifice that ‘me’ for freedom and peace.

RESPONDENT: And what was in the beginning painful is now a good feeling. For example fear.

So I want to thank you and everybody on board for the encouragement I was able to pick up. Yes we need that, support on the way.

VINEETO: I have been increasingly fascinated during my research into fear. In my letters to Alan particularly I have reported the various findings and insights – all nicely collected under the library topic of ‘Fear’, which you have probably already discovered. In the first year of my exploration fear had usually a reason, a content, an issue to look at and explore. It was like a hump one had to get over to reach the underlying base-topic – a particular belief, giving up friends, leaving the familiarity of both the spiritual world and the real world. In my experience the ecstatic experience in the wake of fear disappearing was the emotional relief of tension, but nevertheless an emotion to be scrutinized.

In order to get to the rock-bottom of fear, the instinctual survival fear itself, I had to investigate not only the ‘bad’, unpleasant emotions, but the ‘good’, nice feelings as well. Moreover, feeling ecstatic and blissed was never far from the delusion of an altered state of consciousness, and I did not want to get sucked into that delusion like all the other ill-famed gurus. But with growing awareness, I could increasingly recognize fear as just fear – as you described it – and then get on with life. Fear is, after all, not the main event in life – it is not even actual. But this instinctual state is definitely the engine and driving force within the Human Condition. Now, having examined it in all its facets and variation, it loses its fascinating (and paralyzing) attraction it used to have. The success of life in Virtual Freedom was simply too good to continuously be spoiled by just another wave of fear!

RESPONDENT: I am sharing it also with the community, I work as a massage therapist in an upper class health spa and in my own place. Working with the human conditioning in the physical manifestations is one good possibility to support another to become free.

First supporting the temporary release of the manifestations, then seeing the underlying mental conditioning, understanding and with the magic of intent to let go of the conditioning itself.

VINEETO: I am curious about your understanding of the word ‘conditioning’. I have come to see conditioning as the first layer to be removed, including all the personal, social and collective input that is fed into all of us since birth. But conditioning is not everything. We are all born with a set of survival instincts that make us susceptible to and heavily dependant on the moral conditioning we receive. When the restricting shield of society’s ethics and morals breaks down, the survival instincts of fear and aggression, nurture and desire are as raw as you can observe them in animals. CNN with their daily News gives ample testimony of the various manifestations of those instincts in action. Unless we discover those instinctual passions in ourselves and start to eliminate them, the ‘self’ will continue to exist and create havoc in one cunning way or another. The difference between the path to actual freedom from the Human Condition and any spiritual or psychological ‘solutions’ is that Actual Freedom gives you a method to get rid of the root cause of the problem – ‘me’ in whatever form.

RESPONDENT: Vineeto, like for myself, actual freedom also is interesting me most in my work and sharing with the community. I created this non-profit organization, to go out to the bothered ones, like in the prisons, families and also into the business world. Still a seed, whilst I am doing my own, it will host the work when it’s time. er-ef is the name of that organization. Ironically it means Esoteric Research and Education Foundation, it was first formed 15 years ago and the present name is Health Realization Training Hawaii. You can also replace Health with Freedom.

VINEETO: ‘RF’ i.e. ‘remove formatting’ was rather a joke from my side, because I see the path to actual freedom as the removal of the programming of the brain. Peter jokingly called it ‘amygdala modification’, the successive and finally irreversible modification of the primitive brain into a mere warning organ without any emotional or passionate power to interfere. Then, and only then, can one’s innate intelligence and sensate experiencing be freed to take on the job that it is now capable of – being the universe experiencing itself as a sensate and reflective human being.

Health is a curious topic. In my experience a major percentage of un-wellness and disease originated in and was perpetuated by my emotions and imaginations, and has subsequently disappeared in the process of eliminating those very emotions and imaginations. The remaining plainly physical problems are easily dealt with in a sensible way, once the fear that has fuelled most ailments, has disappeared. Since I started on the journey to eliminate my ‘self’ I have given up all beliefs in alternative medicine, neurotic ‘health-diets’, divinations and new age spiritual healing – they did not even touch the root cause of my problem – ‘me’, the venerated soul and the precious ego. Today I can say that the best I did for my health was to successively remove the very cause of unwell-ness, my feelings, my emotions, my beliefs, my instincts, my very sense of ‘being’.

RESPONDENT: Freedom is innate, is it?

VINEETO: Freedom is innate in the sense that after you remove everything non-actual only the actual remains. The actual world has always been here and the actual me, this body, has been here since birth, but I could hardly ever get a word in edgeways.

But freedom is not innate in that one can wait for it, let go into it, let it happen in due time, let Existence take over, or such NDA twaddle. Freedom is to take one’s life in one’s own hands, determine the course to extinction, assess the obstacles, gather all the intent, courage and bloody-mindedness one can muster and then ... ‘sleeves up’. And, as you say, looking at one’s conditioning is one big step towards freedom, but there is much more magic to be discovered.

RESPONDENT: It was nice to introduce me, Thanks again.

VINEETO: It’s a pleasure to talk to you. I always enjoy talking about my favourite subject, comparing notes and sharing experiences. I wish you a good night from ‘down under’, it’s cozy inside and a fresh and moist winter’s night outside.

15.8.1999

VINEETO: It’s been a long while since I have got around to write on the list. I have been happily busy with combining Richard’s and our website into one big Actual Freedom web – and it is published now on the new domain: http://www.actualfreedom.com.au . I think it is all looking great, and now I am getting into my old correspondence, editing spelling or grammatical mistakes. It is interesting to read again what I wrote nine months ago – I can say I can stand behind all of it. The understanding has not changed but it has definitely deepened, and what had been an announcement of a new discovery is now a familiar and successful life-style.

It works, the actual is actual and the method of ‘How am I experiencing this moment of being alive?’ has been effective in distinguishing the imaginary and emotionally-‘real’ from the actual. I am happy and harmless all day long, enjoying working as much as my free time. Life is immensely simple and ordinary now, and sometimes I am wondering what all the emotional ups and downs in my earlier life have been about.

Now to your letter –

RESPONDENT: Vineeto, I agree with you that living is the challenge for the growth into the freedom, working out there with people is challenging but only if there is anything to loose, then it is a miracle of creation. Yes, really, it is creating life. If there is anything to loose, it is reacting. My own observation with it is that reaction still happens, but it is more like watching a stream flow.

To give you an example: My issues are success and failure with all the emotions there are going by with it. Being employed for the first time in my life I am working in a team of therapists. It happened that I became very successful and that triggered emotions in them. Very feel-able, the vibes were all around and triggered all the programs in my own conditioning. All the habits of reacting and responding came up. Locking at them, understanding and identifying them as software programs, like pushing an icon with the responding software, it was running in the mind, many times unconscious, just as physical sensations. Looking at it closely, letting go, {there comes the letting go} of the habitual identification with the software program called conditioning and the intent not to go with it, is the most amazing thing I ever experienced, letting it peel away, not being for it, not being against it, just realizing its nature and the choice to step out of the stream. Well, for me it’s like opening my eyes. I guess, I had this experience many times before that you realize, you where blind all the way, had your eyes closed but created the image, that you see, that you know and even fight for it. Till one comes to the next step in evolution and so on. To make the story short, I am facing a lot of bullshit, not out there, no, looking in my own face.

VINEETO: It looks like you are having a good time investigating and exploring your different ‘software programs called conditioning’. The technique as you describe it – ‘not being for it, not being against it, just realizing its nature and the choice to step out of the stream’ is exactly the definition for meditation, particularly for Buddhist-based Vipassana. As you are describing, it works to the extent of not getting entangled into tight ideas of how things should be and in ‘letting go’ of one’s former conditioning – it makes things look all right on the surface, but it doesn’t touch the core issue of our inherent animal instincts at all.

Actual Freedom turns 180 degrees in the opposite direction from the normal and spiritual approaches to life’s problems. I am not only investigating my conditioning, which is part of the ego, but I am questioning and eliminating the soul, the core of my being, the ‘higher self’ as well. Actual freedom is to strip yourself from all of your ‘self’ – your ‘Self’ included.

To understand what that means it is vitally important to remember or induce a peak experience. Richard, Peter, Alan and I have written a lot about peak experiences or Pure Consciousness Experiences to explain its nature and its significance. A peak experience gives you the opportunity to experience life without the otherwise ever-present self for a brief period of time. It is like breaking through a layer of thick clouds of one’s beliefs, emotions and inherent instinctual passions and seeing the actual world, as-it-is, for the first time. My first major peak experience happened after intense questioning and heart-churning investigations into my spiritual belief system of being a follower of Rajneesh – and it gave me the first glimpse that I was on the right track, finding the actual world that lay underneath all my constructs of fears and hopes, notions of right and wrong, good and bad. I have described it in ‘A bit of Vineeto’.

It was such a life-shattering experience in that it made it blindingly obvious that the world runs perfectly well without my so dearly held beliefs and emotions, in fact, it made it clear that with all of my instinctual passions ‘I’ am but a dangerous disturbance, yet another loose cannon, to the peace and perfection of the physical universe. In the peak experience I could experience the world as it is and thus experience ‘me’, who I think and feel I am, as the alien entity inside my body, messing everything up. From this I understood and determined my aim in life, and born out of this pure consciousness experience was my intent to sacrifice this alien ‘self’, boots and all, in order to join the perfection that is already existent in this wondrous magical and perfect universe.

RESPONDENT: So – letting go is like intent, having a choice, a choice between going with it or letting it go alone, letting it be.

I could write forever. Let’s stop here!

VINEETO: The fascinating thing about the writings on Actual Freedom is that they not only give you the full description of what is possible – Peter, Alan, Mark and me writing about our peak experiences and life in virtual freedom and Richard describing an ongoing uninterrupted experience of the unimaginable purity, boundless magnificence and sparkling magic of the actual world.

Having experienced this actual world in my 4-hour pure consciousness experience made it impossible for me to settle for second best, to fiddle with my personality or ego like moving deckchairs on the Titanic. I could then knowingly make a choice and knowingly direct my intent to extinguishing all of me, ego and soul, ‘I’ and ‘me’, beliefs, emotions and instincts alike, eliminate the very sense of ‘being’. What is left up to date is but a faint shell of the old Vineeto, well aware that her days are numbered.

There is a bit of Richard’s General Correspondence No 1 that I found relevant to our conversation, if you are interested.

It has been and still is a thrilling and fascinating adventure – and it works.

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