(List D refers to Richard’s List D and his Respondent Numbers)
Vineeto’s Correspondence with Kuba on Discuss Actualism Forum VINEETO: Hi Claudiu, PS: For clarification purposes I would like to address the rumour Milito apparently started from a verbal report (I never wrote about this on the website) which either the reporting person or Milito himself misconstrued and now has been further developed by Kuba – Milito, 1 April 2024: Jeez, Vineeto can cry when a cop writes her a ticket …
(https://discuss.actualism.online/t/milito-s-journal/946/122)
Kuba, 2 April 2024: I have read Actually free people write all sorts of stuff that is weird to me : [...] As Milito mentioned there is the situation where Vineeto cries to get out of trouble with police. (https://discuss.actualism.online/t/milito-s-journal/946/133) Before this rumour gets even more legs and spreads any further like ‘Chinese Whispers’, here is what actually happened – and I remember recounting the event on the meeting with you, Henry, Alan, Jon and No. 45 (List D) in Café 29 – One day whilst driving to a work appointment in Byron Bay on the main 2-lane highway I noticed I was followed by a blinking police car. Because I considered the space at the side of the road too narrow for such a busy road as it was I slowed down to perhaps 30 km/h and drove on to a nearby public car park and stopped there. The police officer commanded me to stay in the car, reached through the open window and took my car keys (as if I was going to escape!). He then proceeded to scold and berate me with great passion because I had not stopped immediately along the busy road. I explained that I had found it unsafe to stop there and then, but he was not satisfied with my explanation and started again with the same berating. When he arrived at the third repeat of his monologue with no sign of abating passion I realized I had to do something if I ever wanted to get to my work appointment. There was no thought of what to do next when suddenly I felt an uprising of a sob from the gut area and so I allowed it to continue, resulting in the eventual calming down of the police officer's mood as I had obviously demonstrated the remorse he was looking for. He then proceeded more calmly to write me a ticket and I could finally go on my way. In hindsight I was amazed and pleased about this event as it was a practical demonstration that despite being devoid of feelings and thus possibly handicapped when dealing with feeling beings, I still have the wherewithal and the options available, if the situation requires it, to communicate a true facsimile of a feeling should it be necessary. * The other point I want to address is this comment – Kuba, 2 April 2024: I have read Actually free people write all sorts of stuff that is weird to me : There is a bit on the AFT where Richard responds to someone by suggesting that what he is doing, in Australia is called ‘being a bit of a wanker’. Now, Kuba could have easily looked up the correct wording and the context for himself on the website to see if it indeed still was ‘weird’ to him and to verify for himself if that quote justifies not paying due diligence in regards to the claims of anyone declaring themselves to be actually free. Here is the sequence which shows that nowhere Richard is ‘suggesting that what he [the respondent] is doing, in Australia is called ‘being a bit of a wanker’’. (Richard, List B, No. 14b, 09 November 1998) [emphasis added]. (Richard, List B, No. 14c, 23 May 1999) (Milito’s Journal DA Forum 946/138) (ActualVineeto, List D Claudiu)
KUBA: Yes thank you for your post Vineeto and it is lovely to have you post here even if just for this one particular purpose. I would never have thought to do something so simple as running the words back and forth through a translator to expose the problem. It is clear to me now why what was in the past termed as the ‘pedantic approach’ by the AFT is actually crucial with regards to the spread of peace on earth. The history of human kind so far has been the blind leading the blind and with bloody consequences. Richard saw this clearly and it seems no-one before him could pin-point what the problem was. VINEETO: Thank you Kuba for your warm welcome. I am particularly chuffed that you recognize that the AFT ‘pedantic approach’ was born of actual care I also congratulate you for standing on the threshold of an out-from-control different way of being – unless you have already crossed the line. KUBA: Vineeto I read your reply to James whilst bearing in mind that what you are describing (the Actualism method) is something completely new, as in it is not some re-arrangement of the ‘tried and true’ ways, and it clicked. It starts with the realisation that this moment which is happening now is my only moment of being alive, and it is never not this moment, furthermore it’s the realisation that this moment is actually happening, this business called being alive is actually taking place now. So bearing the above in mind it is always silly to feel bad because of X, because I am wasting a precious opportunity to enjoy and appreciate life now, and as it is never any other time than now, I am wasting this precious opportunity for nothing. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, The reason why the actualism method is so completely new is because Richard discovered the secret of actual time. Time does not move, it is always now. Time is the arena in which events happen. Events come and go and the arena itself is eternal. You can experience this in a PCE, and on becoming actually free this stillness is instantly apparent via the awareness that time does not move. You have understood it well, and on deeper contemplating this wondrous fact that “now is my only moment of being alive” something magical can happen.
Clocks tick away – what they measure is the rotation of the earth, giving us day and night and everything in between. It’s an ongoing event, which we measure as time for the convenience of arranging events. Actual time is only now. This moment, which is the same anywhere and everywhere, is all there is. You cannot experience any other moment than this moment. Yes, you can remember past events, you can plan future events (you can imbue them with feelings like regret and worry to make them appear more real), but when an event is happening it happens now, in this moment. I can never run out of time – because it is always now. KUBA: Actually considering this further there is also something to the fact that I am wasting this moment of being alive which is of a finite supply that highlights the silliness of feeling bad and also just how precious this moment of being alive is. This is interesting to contemplate in light of mortality, I remember Richard writing that he would not change 1 little bit about this universe. Is it that mortality (a limited supply of time that one can experience being alive) is a key component to this precious aspect? VINEETO: The key component to this moment being “precious” is the fact that this moment is the *only* moment you can experience. Furthermore, by fully comprehending that this is the *only* moment you can actually experience you can tap into infinitude realizing experientially that it is never not this moment. If you are feeling bad now, something precious has been wasted, which is this moment of being alive. The universe will go on forever but it is your *conscious experience of being alive* which is precious. Mortality is inextricable intertwined with it because as humans we are aware that we will die one day. I can’t separate it out – being alive means that one day I won’t be alive. In other words, although it may sound strange – mortality is a precondition for something being alive (else it would be static). It is an intrinsic part and parcel of this universe being perfect, you cannot separate it out. KUBA: I guess it is somewhat funny that ‘I’ can feel resentful towards this universe for the fact of mortality, for not ‘getting enough time’ and yet ‘I’ am busy wasting each moment anyways. Furthermore it is this fact of mortality which makes life precious anyways, so what is it that ‘I’ am asking for? An eternity to suffer? :laughing: I find this whole thing quite fascinating, what is kind of hanging in front of me now is - is it that mortality is actually a gift and not a curse? VINEETO: Here is what Richard pointed out –
As such, you could say that mortality is a gift (and certainly not a curse) – and the very awareness of it can have a beneficent and intensifying impact to lessen one's inclination to waste this moment. To live it with all the enjoyment and appreciation possible and to dedicate one’s life whole-heartedly to a worthy cause. The very possibility that ‘I’ can altruistically die (self-immolate) before physical death to set the actual body free for the benefit of this body, that body and every body is the greatest gift of all for every feeling being. KUBA: Is it that a benevolent universe is set up exactly in this way as to provide intrinsic meaning to being alive, including this crucial component of mortality? VINEETO: Mmh, the universe has not been set up – it has always been here. But I understand what you are asking. Without mortality, without constant change and rearrangement of matter, it would be a static universe, neither benevolent nor beneficent, let alone able to evolve life, and conscious life as we know it. Such a universe can only exist in the imagination of science-fiction writers. Thank you Kuba for your probing questions and contemplations into the secrets of an infinite and eternal universe – it was a special delight to answer. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, Your post reminds me of one that you wrote only 11 days ago and Claudiu’s follow-up reply. KUBA: When I consider this it makes sense to me what an out from control virtual freedom is about, it is the abeyance of the ‘doer’ (that very ‘cell’) and now the ‘beer’ (the remaining ‘centre’) is left freely exposed for the perfection and purity to dynamically do it’s thing. CLAUDIU: It is very freeing in a way. Before, I would need to maintain an EE to some degree, and in a sense there was sort of a restriction of just what I could look at, as the EE would fade if I rocked the boat too much. But now the boat is stable and it seems like I can freely explore anything and everything with this reliable rock-solid foundation of purity that remains unshakeable regardless. Thus I can freely explore the depths of ‘me’ without any fear or concern that the out-from-controlness will fade VINEETO: It seems as if in the meantime this possible in-between step between ‘normal’ and actually free has slipped your mind? The report you quoted of ‘Vineeto’ becoming actually free was precipitated by several weeks of being out-from-control and it made the last part of the journey to an actual freedom not only so much easier but also eminently delicious. There are a lot of benefits when one allows oneself to let the universe (pure intent) to take over control. You say – KUBA: Those ‘last remaining cobwebs’ is exactly how I would describe those remaining dramas, it seems ‘I’ am only holding onto what’s left of them in order to block the momentum that would otherwise follow. This is the tricky part, proceeding without knowing with certainty what the destination is like, it’s stepping into the unknowable. It seems ‘I’ am instead searching for 100% certainty before ‘I’ dare to step out of the cage, which is of course an impossibility as this can only be had upon actual freedom. VINEETO: Once you allow yourself to be out-from-control and the actualism process is set in motion, the brakes no longer work and you are in for the ride of a lifetime not to be missed. I can highly recommend it. ‘Vineeto’s’ last question ‘she’ endeavoured to answer (one day before it happened) was – do I want to live like this forever (the delicious, dynamic experience infused with ever increasing pure intent and experiences of sweetness)? Even though the answer was clear, the moment Richard posed that question to ‘her’, ‘she’ still decided to check it out carefully. But the next day it was still the same answer – yes, of course, I want to live like this forever. KUBA: Yes thank you Vineeto it seems you stopped me right in the tracks of a habit of mine - of hanging back in the ‘normal’ and from there trying to throw some kind of a Hail Mary towards actual freedom. It never works because the distance is too great and from that ‘normal’ place ‘I’ am not advised by the perfection and purity, instead ‘I’ resort to theories. It’s like ‘I’ am hanging out in the cage (with the doors wide open) whilst coming up with the next ‘great escape plan’. Dear Kuba, Ha, you have a delightful way with words. I had been wondering if it was ok to prod you a bit or if you’d rather proceed at your own pace. Now I am glad that I did. Habituation can sometimes be quite a procrastinating feature – and ‘Vineeto’ used to do that a lot. KUBA: It is becoming clear to me that going out-from-control is the next step, in fact I have been hanging out on the edge of this decision for a long time. Now is a great time to do it, with Caudiu having already gone ahead and done it anyways, which I am full of admiration for. Yes, Claudiu is boldly showing the way and giving detailed reports about how an out-from-control virtual freedom works wonders and also what the pitfalls can be which those after him can avoid. Pure intent is far more easily accessible once you made the conscious decision to let go of the controls and it’s a great, thrilling and delicious adventure. KUBA: What I have been doing is setting the intent to continue allowing the perfection and purity each moment again come what may, committing to having that golden clew active at all times, with each instance of the connection being severed being treated as a flashing red light in the same way I would with a diminution into feeling bad. It is exhilarating to commit in such a way, this is going further than I would usually allow myself to, and some more, the rewards are certainly worth the effort though. That’s it and it is indeed exhilarating, galvanizing, electrifying and thoroughly wonder-full. KUBA: Last night I was watching a random YouTube video which was showing the latest high resolution pictures of mars and comparing it with earth. Usually watching astronomy videos ‘I’ feel somewhat alien, alone, small, in danger etc. Essentially there is that backdrop of the existential angst of being a ‘self’. This time it was different, I saw that there is no outside to this universe, that I as this body am not separate from it, and then looking at the pictures of the earth I was able to fully appreciate the wonder and magic of it all. That this enormous and infinitely complex universe even exists in the first place, and further that it has arranged itself into the azure planet called earth, and further that this planet is teeming with life, and further that from all of this a thinking and reflective creature was born, and further that as this creature the universe is able to experience itself – WOW. This is so excellent to read, I had to interrupt because tears of appreciation were running down my face – it is just so mirificent that another fellow human being is about to come out of the cage and is able to marvel at and fully appreciate the magic of this amazing universe, of our verdant and azure planet hanging in space, of all the flora and fauna, and most of all of conscious human life with the ability of being apperceptively aware of being alive. Actuality is utterly breathtaking. KUBA: I realise that all of the above is this body’s and every body’s birthright, and this brings a depth to the words “fellow human being” which I can’t quite put into words. Indeed – you will discover that the depth of intimacy with your fellow human beings increases exponentially the more you allow this marvellous beneficent infinite universe to live you. And your – and ever body’s – birthright is to be the universe experiencing itself as a flesh-and-blood sentient human being. Life is truly wonderful. With all my appreciation for your bold step. KUBA: I noticed this yesterday driving to my hen party jobs and it was a very precious experience, noticing that the breaks no longer work was the culmination of a lifetime of dedication. ‘I’ was stuck in that cage of ‘my’ own making, carrying the burden of being an identity for so many years. And it’s a funny situation because deep down ‘I’ yearn to be free of this burden and yet it is ‘me’ who stubbornly refused to step out of the cage. Knowing that the breaks no longer work allowed ‘me’ for the first time in so long to say a resounding YES! To being alive, what ‘I’ secretly wanted all along. So I wrote recently that I would be nipping at your heels soon, Claudiu and it appears this is exactly what I did :) I’m still being careful before making definitive claims but especially noticeably in the past 2 days there is a momentum which has begun that is not of ‘my’ doing. Noticing my experience the label which fits the most precisely is exactly that of an ongoing and dynamic excellence experience. I was going to write this yesterday but I wanted to see what it would be like when I wake up, and it’s still exactly the same. There are times when some emotion comes up and I think, “ok I am still normal” but then I realise that I don’t have any breaks to put on, I don’t have a way to stop the perfection and purity permeating into the centre that is ‘me’. VINEETO: Dear Kuba, My deepest appreciation for your wonderful news. “What ‘you’ secretly wanted all along”, how fitting, how marvellous. Thank you. Have a great ride and enjoy it to the max while it lasts. (I think you will understand the “while it lasts” correctly). Hi Kuba, hi Claudiu, hi everyone, In the last week I have been busy reformatting and publishing Dona’s and Alan’s (dead-link) [https://actualfreedom.net/australia-questions/] web-page on the AFT website at One of the major topics of this three-week event of answers to questions from forum members in 2017 was that there are *no conditions to become actually free*. “Richard said there is *no connection at all* between feeling good each moment again and actual freedom. You can become actually free right now. But … In the meantime, while you’re living your life not actually free, why not feel good? As he says, this is your only moment of being alive, why waste it feeling bad?” For instance – 09 Nov 2017 Geoffrey: There is something I’ve been thinking about since:
(my remark: same as a PCE… you are either in a PCE or you are not)
I remember making a remark on Slack that ‘allowing it to happen’ we usually used in reference to having PCEs, not self-immolation. And that it was a nice ‘parallel’ between the identity going in abeyance, and in oblivion. But I was wondering if there was more to this than just a ‘parallel’.
… and there go my many ‘attempts’ lol, including yesterday’s one (when I was “contemplating on altruism”) – which interestingly ended in a PCE. This has happened lately, that when ‘trying’ to self-immolate I don’t end up in ASCs anymore, but in PCEs. This is the case since I’ve stopped ‘forcing it’, but instead trying to ‘allow it to happen’.
So the same thing that causes a PCE could result in self-immolation instead, if one is ready/has
fully committed to becoming actually free.
Then Self- immolation is a ‘spontaneous’ occurrence – when one is ready/fully committed. 1. Is all the above correct? Dona: you posted Alan saying, “there is no trying” to self-immolate... And that there are no ‘rules’ and no conditions for self-immolation to happen. So, that same answer still applies to all your questions above. Geoffrey: 4. If so I have to ask once more the question you must be tired to hear: how do I get ready? Dona: again, there are no conditions, you are ready when you are ready. Then in the meantime... (Lol... You know the answer...) ... Yep, the actualism method. Though Richard and Vineeto understand that you want a “formula” (Dona sidenote: so do I!) ... There is none. Everyone is different and has their own way. There are things that Vineeto suggested that she did ... But ... they are NOT to be considered
“conditions”. Richard added: “there’s nothing you can do to become actually free, and there’s nothing you can’t do”. Alan: Much the same as Dona has written. The main thing I got (again!) from our conversation is that there is no particular route to be followed. Your second and third questions are setting conditions. There are none! The experience (what they have ‘done’) of each person who has become actually free so far has been different. Vineeto said her experience was giving ‘herself’ permission to allow it to happen – but others did not experience that. Become interested, vitally interested (until it becomes a fascination) in ‘you’ and how ‘you’ operate. Discover what objections there are to becoming actually free. In the meantime commit to feeling good each moment again for the rest of your life and enjoy and appreciate this only moment of being alive – there is no difference between the ends and the means.
* As we all know, Geoffrey succeeded in becoming actually free 10 months later and thus made good on his promise at the end of the question-answer-event – 13 Nov 2017 Geoffrey: No more questions for me. Dona: Richard and Vineeto appreciated hearing this, with big smiles. I very much enjoyed reading the whole web-page anew, and I also much appreciate reading on the forum now that another wave is coming yet again. KUBA: So I have been down with some serious flu the past few days, and yet I have been experiencing the most incredible things, I have wondered at times if it was some delirium caused by the flu haha but I am on the mend now and things are getting even more incredible. What I have been experiencing is what Vineeto was alluding to here (Claudiu’s Journal – #189 by Vineeto):
Indeed what I am experiencing now is a ride of a lifetime, it is something that I am struggling to put into words but it’s simply unmatched by anything that came before. The flavour of these experiences is exactly what Claudiu wrote recently :
And it is this ‘very strange’ aspect that I cannot put into words but it is beyond wonderful to experience. How is it that I am having experiences where it is as if ‘I’ and ‘reality’ never existed in the first place, where the actual world is simply the only thing in existence, where it has always been like this and it could not be any other way. And yet there is the memory (fading though) of ‘my’ life and of ‘reality’, did it ever exist? The weirdest thing is that this can flip in a matter of seconds, as in 1 moment ‘I’ exist and do ‘my’ thing and then the next it’s as if ‘I’ never existed in the first place. It’s like some weird amnesia and I find myself yo-yoing between these, but the whole thing is utterly safe, there is not even a trace of fear or resistance to this, it’s such a delight to experience myself like this. It seems the most wonderful thing about actuality is that it is all there is! Seeing this brings a safety and a completeness that has to be experienced to be known, it is indeed beyond ‘my’ wildest dreams. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, What a marvellous wondrous ride indeed! Are you perhaps wondering – in “seeing this brings a safety and a completeness” – why you would want to continue to “flip in a matter of seconds” ? Is it because … perchance … there is still one job to do ? The last job … to give permission … to allow it to happen … forevermore … irrevocably …
KUBA: Yes thank you Vineeto, you couldn’t be more accurate with your suggestion because this question has been burning inside me so much so that it just continued through the night whilst sleeping, only to wake up to your post. I was wondering why is it that ‘I’ still come back? Because this sense of magic that I am experiencing is beyond compare, and yet ‘I’ come back… But just like one cannot self immolate in a PCE, ‘I’ still have a job to do when ‘I’ flip back, this is why ‘I’ flip back. This flavour of magical sweetness that I am experiencing, it is so profound that it is impossible not to commit. It is a familiar flavour but it has never been this imminent, the flavour is of the final destination. At times I wonder could it really be this wonderful, and yes it is exactly what is here for all of humankind. So that’s as far as it goes for now, yet something seems very imminent. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, Yes, this is the flavour I perceive from your post. You can have supreme confidence to allow the universe to do the rest. Enjoy the sweetness and the magic. KUBA: So I have finished reading the reports now, although
the facts of my experience speak for themselves at this point it is still great to see that things line up.
Which means, being confronted with some occurring obstacle, which is part and parcel of investigating the human condition, is not the same thing as falling back to normal. It’s part and parcel of the actualism process as long as you connect back with pure intent and continue to experience that the brakes don’t work at the end of the “parenthesis” period. This was a nice thing to read because it means that in making the decision to step out from control ‘I’ may have got myself onto a one way ride, one that is unlikely to end in anything but ‘my’ demise, considering this puts a smile on my face every time. This question of ‘falling back to normal’ this is something that I can also confirm in myself, that it is a case of working through whatever aspect of the human condition is presenting itself, yet I have not been ‘normal’ since the initial change. It’s as if ‘I’ dip into those patterns so that they can be fully experienced and unravelled, of course how else could the actualism process eventuate? VINEETO: Hi Kuba, Yes, indeed, “how else could the actualism process eventuate?” It’s an utter delight to read your report and to learn that you received all the confirmation and information to be confident and at ease to proceed where only pure intent (without “affective shrapnel” is beckoning. And now you have reached the rewarding stage, according to your previous report 6 days ago that – KUBA: ‘I’ am very much needed in order to actualise
what the universe intends. It makes ‘my’ petty life all worth it in the end, ‘I’ can gladly sacrifice ‘myself’
to allow this perfect destiny, ‘I’ can go out in a blaze of glory. VINEETO: !YES! All the ingredients are lined up for you to make this last part of the ride a fun and exciting success! KUBA: The other thing is reading Vineeto now vs before, it’s funny that before I was projecting a phantom of sorts, one that was synonymous with authority. But of course Vineeto hasn’t changed between then and now, it was ‘I’ that changed. It is a propitious situation to have her as a target which we can all unequivocally and safely aim for. VINEETO: Just like once Richard described it – there is a helpful flag in the distant golf-hole to make the aiming more easy and precise. KUBA: Also :
And this is what I find myself smack bang in the middle, it’s fascinating that abandoning ‘humanity’ means a movement towards pure intent, only pure intent. I always knew that this would eventually be the next step, it’s just that ‘I’ could not quite face the ramifications. It seems the core of the resistance is essentially a fear of being seen as completely insane, and the danger this apparently presents. Although this drama is having very little credibility these days, all it takes is to turn and look over my shoulder, back to where ‘humanity’ is, for a reminder of what exists ‘back there’, then I gladly continue proceeding towards pure intent. VINEETO: I think when you take honest stock you will see that you have already left most of your ‘sane’ experience of belonging to humanity behind, and I guess you wouldn’t even recognize yourself from a couple of years ago. So, yes, this “drama” is more like a phantom and an idea rather than concrete reality and most of it is already left behind. KUBA: But I recognise this as the next step, to abandon ‘humanity’, to no longer have the ability to ‘fit’ into it, to no longer have the capacity to belong or even to relate to other identities, … VINEETO: I can confirm from my own experience that relating to other people is mostly very easy, especially in everyday communication – they are now all fellow human beings and most of them are a joy to interact with. KUBA: I can see in that direction there is only pure intent, also I can see that walking in that direction I might find that I turn back around to see the door back to ‘reality’ closing, how exciting! VINEETO: How wonderfully exciting – I am reminded of ‘Vineeto’s’ last hours – there was so much fun and ease and laughter that ‘she’ missed the moment it happened and only recognized what had happened when it was all over and real-world time had stopped (I had said to Richard, quite casually, “we have all the time in the universe” and that gave it away, lol). Enjoy it – it’s the time of your life. I much appreciate you being here.
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